Bingo’s Breakdown: Survivor Series Predictions

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Greetings jabronis,

A brief warning to all – this article will contain Smackdown spoilers, so if you’re reading this before Smackdown has aired and don’t want to be spoiled, then RUN! Run away now and, much like Simba in The Lion King, return when you’re ready to face what lies ahead.

So, the WWE mothership continues to pump out its PPV babies thick and fast, and lo and behold the Survivor Series is now upon us.

I for one am truly upset by the fact that The Undertaker won’t be part of the proceedings to mark his 20th year with the company – but I won’t go into a long, hinging diatribe as to why that is… because I’m saving that for next week. My musings over the matter got a bit long-winded and thus I thought it would be wise to devote an entire column to it. So keep your eyes peeled for that one – but please don’t take an actual potato peeler to your eyes. That would be very foolish.

My prediction column will run slightly different than normal as joining me in my imaginary booth today is fellow Wresting-Edge contributor Bad News Browne (that’s his real name by the way). So you get double the opinion for the same entrance price – you lucky, lucky urchins.

But this is still Bingo’s Breakdown and thus this is my house – so if Bad News Browne steps out of line or starts putting his feet up on the furniture – I’ll have no trouble in slapping the taste out of his mouth.

Our thoughts predictions are as followed… bombs away!

Santino and Koslov v Slater and Gabriel

Bingo Nik: I don’t see this being anything much beyond a comedy filler bout (as anything match involving Santino always is) but that’s not necessarily a bad thing. Santino does comedy 100% better then most other guys on the WWE roster.

BNB: Yeah, I don’t expect miracles either, just a 3 minute comedy spot-fest. I expect Nexus to retain with a 450 from Gabriel – likely after some form of cheating or interference from those other Nexus fellows.

Bingo Nik: I’ll go for Slater to hit Koslov with the 450 splash after Santino accidentally trips up his tag partner with a rogue banana peel or something. Hilarity!

Picks:
Nik: Nexus
BNB: Nexus

gabriel

Sheamus v John Morrison

BNB: First of all – I don’t understand Morrison’s motives as a face in this contest. He is interfering in Sheamus’ business for no real reason. If anything Sheamus is playing the face here, as he has been nobly trying to battle a coward, who is avoiding fighting him and relying on a unrelated 3rd party to help him. JoMo, fight your own battles! Maybe I am over thinking this one too much.

Bingo Nik: BNB is right, the set-up for this feud is rather odd… I’d like to think that WWE are sowing the seeds for a Morrison heel turn, but I don’t think they’re intelligent enough to realise the nonsensical nature of their storyline here.

BNB: On to the match – I expect Sheamus to go over clean in this one, as he needs to be rehabilitated after losing the title earlier on this year. I fully expect this to be an entertaining match – it might even kick off the show as WWE traditionally like to open with a bang.

Bingo Nik: I think Santino will perhaps get involved. Maybe if he screws things up and costs Morrison the match, that could be the catalyst for The Shaman of Sexy turning heel? I’m gonna go for a Morrison victory here though, because if he loses then Morrison is still where he started on the pegging order, and then what’s been achieved? Plus, sometimes it’s just fun to disagree with Bad News Browne.

Bingo Nik: John Morrison
BNB: Sheamus

Shea

Dolph Ziggler v Kaval

Bingo Nik: It was nice to see Kaval’s losing streak come to an end on this week’s Smackdown – but should it really have been at the expense of the IC champion?! WWE booking decisions are sometimes so retarded they’re impossible to understand how the creative team ever gave the motion a green light.

But retardation aside, this should be a bloody good match. Hopefully they’ll get at least 10 or 12 minutes to tell a decent story, and the PPV exposure will be a much-needed boost for the under-utilised Kaval.

BNB: For sure – this should be a fine match if given time, even with Kaval looking like a total loser for cashing in his title opportunity on a secondary title (more retardedness!), as well as losing 99% of his matches thus far.

Bingo Nik: I expect Dolph to retain, but I feel this will be one of those matches where both guys will emerge from it looking stronger.

BNB: Yep, Ziggler to retain with the Zig Zag, following a run in from that one on NXT he was linked with (Kaitlyn?), and a cat fight with Vickie.

Nik: Ziggler
BNB: Ziggler

Ziggle

Natalya v Lay Cool

Bingo Nik: Isn’t this the third PPV in a row featuring this bout? I rarely pay any attention whatsoever to the women’s division, unless there’s a nipple slip or something. That’s just the heinous example of mankind that I am. I’ll say third time lucky for Natalya, just for the sake of using the phrase “third time lucky” if nothing else.

BNB: I expect this will be short, even though all 3 can work to a certain extent. I see Nattie going over clean with the sharpshooter, after a returning Beth Phoenix helps even the odds.

Bingo Nik: Oh, is this a handicapped match? Meh, whatever. I’m too lethargic to change my pick.

Nik: Natalya
BNB: Natalya

nat

Big Show, MVP, Masters, Mysterio, Kofi v Drew McIntyre, Cody Rhodes, Alberto Del Rio, Tyler Reks, Jack Swagger

Bingo Nik: So the Survivor Series gets at least one traditional elimination match-up, which should appease the purists a little. I’m truly fed up in seeing The Big Show pick up victories over younger (and ultimately better) talent so I’m pinning my hopes on a heel victory here.

Alberto Del Rio is leading into a feud with MVP which is a bit depressing for him… He should be feuding with wrestlers of a higher calibre following his programme with Re Mysterio, but I guess, due to the shallow pool of main event talent on Smackdown, there was no obvious choice.

But Del Rio truly is THE man, so I’m hoping he picks up the victory here – and once he’s done with his MVP thing, WWE should waste no more time in rushing this guy to the top.

BNB: The only traditional survivor series match (see my ‘Survivor Series Memories’ column to hear me lament this turn of events) on the card has at least a number of competent workers who can put on an exciting match. (The only real duds in here being Chris Masters and Tyler Reks).

I expect Rhodes and McIntyre to eliminate each other, continuing their feud, Swagger to hopefully eliminate MVP, and, even though it would make sense for Del Rio to go over, Rey to pin him to win it for his team.

Nik: Team Del Rio
BNB: Team Mysterio (Rey last eliminating Del Rio)

riorey

Edge v Kane

Bingo Nik: This feud seems hurriedly thrown together (mainly because it was – due to the aforementioned lack of main event level talent on Smackdown) and as a result, it seems rather tepid.

BNB: Indeed. I make no apologies in predicting that this bout will stink. I’m bored of Kane and I’m bored of babyface Edge. I don’t really care who wins … Kane? Yeah, that’ll do.

Bingo Nik: I’m sure Edge will do his utmost to make a decent match out of it, but because the lack of interest pertaining to the circumstances of the match, it’s gonna feel pretty flat. I think the live crowd could go worryingly quiet for this one, and head to that merchandise stands to purchase some more of those hideously ugly John Cena T-shirts. The fools.

I’ll go for Kane to win too, just because there would be no point in putting the title on Edge at the moment, and because the build-up has been so lackluster. Are we really supposed to believe that Edge has kept Paul Bearer tied to a wheelchair all week long? I know a lot of wrestling storylines require us to suspend our disbelief, but even a 6 year old me would have questioned the logic of that one.

Nik: Kane
BNB: Kane

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Randy Orton v Wade Barrett

Bingo Nik: Although the motivations are slightly flawed in this story (why would Cena care if Orton lost the title? He kicked his Dad in the head not so long ago after all…), I still have to congratulate WWE on setting up an intriguing premise for what will surely be the last match of the night.

John Cena is such a dull character that I fully expect him to stay true to his statement to call it down the middle, even if it will cost him his job (yeah, right) but some cock up along the way will see Cena misinterpret shenanigans somehow and award the title to Barrett.

BNB: Stellar work from Roddy Piper and John Cena on Monday means that I am actually looking forward to this. I do not expect it to be a titanic struggle as Barrett’s work isn’t quite there yet, but Cena as ref should cover up for those flaws. I see the ending being : Cena bumped/poked in the eye, Barrett low blow to Orton whilst Cena’s hurt, Wasteland, new champion.

Nik: Barrett
BNB: Barrett

nex

Will The Miz cash in MITB?

Bingo Nik: WWE have teased it enough, so why not? I still don’t perceive Barrett as having the stature to carry the RAW brand, and to pull the trigger on a Miz title reign would be awesome. If Cena keeps true to his word, then he’ll pound the crap out of Wade after the match, allowing The Miz to sneak down and steal the pin.

Of course, The Miz cashing in his MITB seems almost too obvious to happen for an abundance of us wrestling fans but – I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again – WWE have demonstrated countless times in the past that they have no qualms in executing the obvious.

BNB: I too fully expect The Miz to cash in his MITB and be crowned new WWE champion. One question though – as soon as the Orton v Barrett match is over, won’t that mean that Nexus are then able to be at ringside?

Bingo Nik: I believe Mr Barrett confirmed as much on RAW this week, yes.

BNB: What if Nexus run down to assist Barrett, but then turn on him and assist The Miz instead – and then The Miz is installed as the new leader of Nexus Barrett has been a bit of an ass head of late after all.

Bingo Nik: Hey, I like that. Or maybe just Otunga comes down, and he turns on Barrett and aligns himself with The Miz. They both have the “celebrity before WWE” thing going for them so they’d work well as a unit. Maybe.

BNB: I like that too! High five!

Bingo Nik: I guess we’re just gonna have to wait and see. Oooooh – I love surprises! Unless it’s finding a severed horse head in my bed as I awake. That sucks.

Well it’s time to call time on the column. Thank you very much indeed for your input, Bad News Browne. We agreed on all but 2 of the outcomes – so apologies to all you readers for a general lack of dramatic conflict. We promise to get violent towards one another in the future.

I hope all y’all readers enjoy the Survivor Series as much as your little, black hearts will let you.

I’m only kidding – I’m sure your hearts are a vibrant red and pump masses of unconditional love with a healthy glow.

Over and out.

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