Greetings jabronis,
Despite coming off the back of a piss-poor RAW, I have high hopes for the TLC PPV. There’s a barrage of decent bouts on the card – and if everyone is on their A-game, us grapple fans could be in for an early festive treat I feel.
BNB: I don’t share your enthusiasm. I do respect it… but regretfully cannot share it
Nik: Ah yes. Joining me in my imaginary booth once again is fellow Wrestling-Edge contributor Bad News Browne. Last time round, we both correctly predicted the outcome of 5 of the 7 match-ups at the Survivor Series, so neither of us were able to claim bragging rights.
Instead we had to settle matters with a scratching and hair-pulling match – which sadly also culminated in a draw. Hopefully this time round there will be an outright winner. I hate having my hair pulled.
BNB: And I hate being scratched.
Nik: Sorry dude.
The card has been dwindled down to just 6 matches following the merging of the Heavyweight title match with the Rey Mysterio v Del Rio hootananny… I expect Koslov and Santino to feature in a bout on the night, but for now this is all we have to chew on. You want our predictions? Well then, I’m very happy to tell you that you’ve come to the right place.
Ladder Match: Dolph Ziggler v Kofi Knigston v Jack Swagger
BNB: I get the fact that it is a TLC PPV, but this doesn’t really need to be a ladder match. At the Hell in a Cell PPV, it’s not as if every match takes place in the cell.
That being said, this should be good with all 3 being exceptional athletes. I’m putting Ziggler over here, as Swagger has never recovered from his world title run, and Kofi has never recovered from his programme with Orton. Would be cool if Swagger did a double ankle lock so the others couldn’t climb the ladder.
Nik: Swagger’s stock has indeed declined massively since his run with the world title came to an end. Now I bet he’s just happy to even feature on a PPV!
It would have been nice (nice? Yeah, nice) if Kaval was also involved in this match to make it a fatal 4 way as the stipulation would have provided an environment his wrestling style would flourish in, but alas it’s not to be. Nonetheless, as BNB said, this definitely has the ingredients to be a top notch spectacle.
I too kind of fancied Ziggler to retain… but seeing that Bad News Browne has also gone down that route, I’m gonna side with Kofi, just for the sake of being different.
Picks
Nik: Kofi Kingston
BNB: Dolph Ziggler
Ladder Match: John Morrison vs Sheamus
Nik: I think this could well be match of the night. Sheamus has been one of the most consistent performers of the year, and he’s totally won me over after admittedly I was initially pretty lukewarm about his rapid ascension to the the top… And we all know what John Morrison is capable of with a ladder (and I’m not referring to window cleaning)
The Ginger Ninja needs to be kept strong as a programme with the returning HHH is surely imminent… In which case, I don’t see the need for him to be back in the title picture just yet. Maybe HHH will cost him the match here somehow? Although returning unannounced at a gimmick PPV is perhaps a little too low-key for the self-proclaimed King of Kings.
BNB: Another ladder match? Gimmick overkill, and no doubt this will ruin the PPV for 2011. Anyways, this should be another great match, Sheamus has come on leaps and bounds and Morrison always thrives in this kind of bout. I’m calling HHH’s music being played, Sheamus distracted, Morrison grabs whatever is up there (a contract I presume, or a raccoon would be quite funny) – and then we have Miz vs Morrison and HHH vs Sheamus at the rumble.
Nik: Yeah, maybe just an appearance from HHH’s theme music rather than HHH himself… that should be enough to make the crowd giddy.
I’m going for Morrison to pick up the victory too – and then he’ll hopefully receive his long overdue chance to headline a PPV at the Royal Rumble.
Picks
Nik: John Morrison
BNB: John Morrison
Tables Match: Lay Cool vs Natalya and Beth Phoenix
Nik: This really takes the shine off of The Miz v Randy Orton match later in the show. Are we really supposed to believe that table matches have any sort of lethal element when 4 busty ladies are taking part in one earlier in the night? Weak.
Landing on a table is always stupid anyway (it cushions the impact of the landing if anything) but, in the wrestling world, we all need going through a table is at least as painful as being hit by a pseeding truck. Perhaps even more painful than that even.
BNB: This will be bad. Very bad. Faces to win, but some miscommunication between Natalya and Beth will simmer until a Phoenix heel turn, leading to a Mania match between the two best women in the division.
Nik: As ever, I really don’t/can’t care who wins. The booking of the women’s division is way beyond me as I always fast forward through it (unless there’s a nip-slip) so I’m just gonna toss a coin. Heads for faces. Tails for heels… It was tails.
Picks
Nik: Natalya and Beth Phoenix
BNB: Lay Cool
Chairs Match: John Cena v Wade Barrett
Nik: I was hoping a “chairs match” would essentially just be a game of musical chairs but, alas, I don’t think I’m gonna get my wish.
BNB: YAWN. What an epic, epic waste. Why didn’t they just put Cena off TV until the rumble? Ratings wouldn’t have dropped, and you could have kept referring to him without having him on screen every week. I couldn’t care who wins, but I suppose I have to pick – Super Cena to round off another wasted feud.
Nik: This feud has massively overstayed its welcome. The booking of it was fantastic to begin with, but now it has nosedived into a pit of nonsensical stupidity. Cena (and WWE) should feel thoroughly ashamed with himself for cutting that phony, disgusting “retirement” speech on RAW only to be back on TV the following week. Of course I understand it’s just a storyline – but to not even honour the stipulation for one single week is beyond atrocious. How are WWE audiences ever supposed to emotionally invest in stipulations in the future if they genuinely don’t mean a thing?
I see Cena winning here too thus finally putting this sorrowful feud to bed. Barrett can then drop down to the midcard – where he belongs. He’s an okay performer… but only okay. He certainly doesn’t belong in main events no more than me or Bad News Browne.
BNB: But I think I do belong in main events.
Nik: You’re probably right. I apologise.
Picks
Nik: John Cena
BNB: Super Cena
TLC Match: Kane v Edge v Rey Mysterio v Alberto Del Rio
Nik: I guess this match has been hastily changed to compensate for Rey Mysterio’s well documented shoulder injury. But I’m all for the change – the Kane v Edge feud has been pretty damn boring, and WWE has the chance to really mix up the main event scene here.
BNB: THANK GOD they changed this match as Kane vs Edge is my standout for Worst Feud of 2010. Though I do fear for Rey as he should not be put in any ladder/TLC matches as he could break into a million pieces. He’s just so freaking injury prone of late.
On a whim, I think they could put Del Rio over to start the new year with two fresh heel champs. Again, like Miz, he has not been built up well in the ring, but carries the air and graces of a top star. Please WWE, put the title on him before you draft him to Raw for no reason!
Nik: I too have entertained the thought of Del Rio becoming champ and I certainly think it’s a possibility… but I’m more inclined to believe that Kane will retain here, mainly due to the lack of build up for the match. I think Kane’s title run is running low on gas though, and he will certainly drop the strap in early 2011 as we go into Wrestlemania season.
Picks
Nik: Kane (but I hope it it’s Del Rio)
BNB: Alberto Del Rio
Tables Match: The Miz vs Randy Orton
BNB: It’s hard to tell whether it’s been a good or bad start to Miz’s reign as WWE Champ. On one hand, he has been golden on the stick, and is the most contemporary champ we have seen in some time. But on the other hand, he had to rely on interference from Michael Cole to retain his belt against 61 year old Jerry Lawler. Now don’t get me wrong, the match told a great story etc, but did it put over Miz strong as champ? No sirree… especially considering it was his first defence.
Nik: I understand what you’re saying, but I think that’s the way WWE wants to portray The Miz character – as a totally non-deserving champion who always makes a lucky escape with the belt. Much like JBL’s long reign in 2004/2005.
I absolutely hated the fact that Kevin Nash felt the need to air negative comments pertaining to The Miz’s title win incidentally. Nash apparently feels that The Miz winning the title exposes the fictional nature of the business. For real? Did he pay no attention to the way in which The Miz won the belt? The Miz didn’t single handedly defeat five heavyweights or anything like that – he cashed in his money in the bank and pinned a guy who’d juts been decked by seven others!
Shame on Nash. And I’d also like to add that The Miz is ten times the performer than Nash ever was.
BNB: Anyways, onto the match – I fully expect Miz to retain, as I imagine they will keep the belt, sorry, CHAMPIONSHIP, on him until Mania, where he will lose to John Cena. Maybe A-Ry will help him? Or Michael Cole? Should be okay – table matches are a pretty crap gimmick but could lead to some dramatic near misses.
Nik: Yep, The Miz will retain. Orton is reportedly pretty busted up at the moment and may require time off, so I’m calling this an absolute dead cert.
The wrestling community hasn’t been this divided over a champion in many years, and it’s generating a plethora of heated chatter all over the interwebz and around water-coolers – which is great for the business. My take on it? The Miz rules.
Picks
Nik: The Miz
BNB: The Miz
Nik: That’s your lot, kiddywinks. As ever, please leave your comments below saying whether you agree or disagree with us… if you strongly disagree with anything we’ve said then please post your home address so that we can come over to your house and discuss the matter in person like real gentlemen. And please ensure you have lemonade in your fridge. We love lemonade.
This will be my last column of 2010 so I’d also like to take this opportunity wish you all the very merriest of Christmases and I sincerely hope that Santa brings you everything you’ve wished for… Unless you’ve wished for the severed head of Bambi. That’s just cruel.
BNB: Merry Christmas, jabronis!
Over and out
