Impact Wrestling results from 3/23/17

Here are the results from yesterday’s (Thurs. March 24, 2017) episode of Impact Wrestling (courtesy of Wrestling Inc.):

The show opens with a dark screen with the words, “In Memoriam Jan Ross”. A classy way to start off the show by paying respect to the late wife of Jim Ross….

Impact Wrestling kicks off with a video that recaps what took place last week on the show. 

‘The Lone Wolf’ Davey Richards w/Angelina Love vs. Suicide

Fast paced start to this one. Suicide hits two straight arm drags on Richards. He continues to gain momentum with a head scissors, dropkick and then hits a plancha to the outside. Moments later, Richards gets things going in his favor when he pulls Suicide to the outside, and then throws him into the barricade. He kisses Angelina and then charges at Suicide and hits him with a big boot. Richards controls the next couple minutes of the match. He goes back to making out with his wife. The delay allows Suicide to recover. He hits a springboard missile dropkick on Davey. Then follows that up with a suicide dive. The action heads back inside and Suicide ends up hitting a springboard moonsault onto Richards. This leads to a near pinfall. Moments later, Richards battles back. He connects with a throw suplex on Suicide and then nails him with a running forearm. After a few counters and reversals between both men. Richards hits a running side kick to Suicide’s head and then pins him for the victory.

Davey Richards defeats Suicide

After Richards and Love are shown celebrating in-ring. We cue to the broadcast table at ringside. Jeremy Borash teases Josh Mathews by telling him that “She” has arrived.

An LAX vignette airs. It shows the newest version of the group seated together around a table drinking beers. Very similar look and setting to the old Aces and Eights vignettes. Minus the gangsta beat in the background. Konnan tells his group that last week was just a warning shot. That LAX are marksman that are never going to miss at their targets. He even mentions how “Impact Crackers” came to his home in Mexico and tried to jack his tag team titles. Konnan tells his group that he wants them to take The Impact Tag Team titles.

 

Back from the break and McKenzie Mitchell is backstage. She sees Laurel Van Ness sitting on a production box. She is still in her wedding attire. McKenzie interviews her. A drunk Laurel claims that she is fine. She then starts crying and admits that she isn’t fine. She says that she was supposed to have babies with Braxton Sutter. Laurel says that everyone ruined her life. She starts screaming how she hates Maria and Sienna. Just then, Sienna comes into the picture. She tells Laurel to not hate Maria and her. That her real enemies are Allie and Braxton. Sienna then tells Laurel to go take a shower and get herself together. When Sienna leaves, Laurel continues to sob and sings the tomorrow song from Annie.

Idris Abraham, Fallah Bahh & Mario Bokara Vs. Mahabali Shera, The Laredo Kid & Garza Jr.

Billed as an international six-man match by new ring announcer Rockstar Spud. Bahh and Bokara are the current Monster Factory tag team champions. Guess The Hardy’s missed their chance at those titles….. All 6 men here with unique looks. Garza Jr. and Abraham start things off. Garza gets the best of Idris and then strips down to his tights. Laredo Kid is next in with Bokara. Laredo gets the best of Mario and connects with a snap hurricanrana. Into the ring now is the 400 pound plus, Fallah. He goes one on one with Laredo. Fallah actually leaves his feet and hits a flying crossbody on Laredo. Bahh’s team controls the next few minutes of the match. They isolate Laredo in their corner and they each take turns working him over. Eventually, Laredo is able to rally and escape. He tags in Shera. Mahabali comes in hot and goes after all 3 of his opponents. He ends up hitting a sky high on Fallah. Which would probably be phrased as a knee high. Seconds later, Shera hits Bokara with an actual sky high and pins him.

Mahabali Shera, Garza Jr. & The Laredo Kid defeat Fallah Bahh, Mario Bokara & Idris Abraham

 

A limousine is shown pulling up to the back with presumably “She”. The driver comes out and guards the door to the limo.

Decay (Abyss & Crazzy Steve) w/Rosemary Vs. Reno Scum (Adam Thornstowe & Luster The Legend) 

Mathews announces on commentary that new tag team champions will be crowned next week on Impact. Thornstowe and Steve start off the match. Thornstowe out does Steve and hits a standing moonsault. Luster is in now with Abyss. They trade strikes in the ring. Luster wins the battle. Steve is back in and Reno Scum double team him. They continue to control the action. Meanwhile on commentary, Mathews is talking about the limo outside. Josh then claims that he and Ric Flair used to travel together in a limo throughout all the territories. Borash says that Mathews was the driver…. Decay gets things back in their favor in this match. Thanks to Rosemary. She intervenes and grounds and pounds Thornstowe on the outside. Abyss then grabs Thornstowe and splashes him in the corner of the ring. Steve follows up with a running cannon ball. Minutes later, Abyss and Crazzy Steve attempt the same tandem move on Thornstowe but this time, Steve misses. Thornstowe tags in Luster. He grabs Steve and hits a fishermen’s brainbuster. All 4 men are now in the ring. Luster gets the better of Abyss and knocks him to the outside with a running shoulder block. Luster goes after Abyss on the outside and ends up throwing him into the steel steps. Meanwhile in the ring, Steve is holding up Thornstowe for Rosemary. She comes into the ring and accidentally spews Steve with green mist. Luster comes into the ring and grabs Rosemary and press slams her over the top rope, and onto Abyss. Reno Scum then wins the match when they hit a tandem assisted double foot stomp on Crazzy Steve.

Reno Scum defeats Decay

Leading into the break. A sit down interview by Bruce Prichard with Bobby Lashley airs. In the sit-down interview, Lashley talks about his history as an athlete. He talks about how he nearly competed in the 2004 Olympics. How he was training to be a part of the Olympics through the army when he was in the military. Lashley talks about being a national champion and all of his accolades. He tells a story about how he was robbed and assaulted leading into the Olympics. Lashley talks about how he was going to the bank and was attacked. How it led to him getting injured and having 40 thousand dollars stolen from him. Lashley says that he has had a chip on his shoulder ever since. When he his Olympic dream was taken from him. It changed the person he was. How all that adversity led to him becoming a wrestler. Parts 1 and 2 are in the videos below.

 

 

A teaser video airs for next week’s Impact. It teases that Fury will be unleashed on 4-6-17.

Impact Grand Championship Match
Moose Vs. Eli Drake w/Tyrus

Before this match can start. A camera shoots back to the limo in the parking lot. Out of the limo comes Cody and Brandi Rhodes. Cody with a Bullet Club hoodie on makes his way to the arena. Back in The Impact Zone, Moose is on the ramp making his entrance and Cody comes up from behind and attacks him. Cody hits the Cross Rhodes on Moose and lays him out. Cody then grabs the Grand Championship and raises it over his head while standing over Moose. Trainers and officials come out to check on Moose after Cody leaves. They tend to Moose and then help him get to the back. As the match is called off.

Moose & Eli Drake ends in a no-contest

 

When the show returns from the break. The lights have been dimmed in The Impact Zone. The sound of helicopters and police sirens play in the arena. After gunshots ring out, LAX makes their way to the ring. It’s Konnan, Homicide, Santana, Ortiz & Diamante.

Konnan gets on the house mic. He has a message for “The Impact Mafia.” That this time the war with them will be decided street style and not in the Tribunal.

The Latin American Xchange (Santana & Ortiz) Vs. The Death Crew Council (Bram & James Storm)

LAX gets early control when Santana and Ortiz jump Storm at the bell and double team him. Some tandem offense with Santana hitting a standing moonsault by leaping off of Ortiz’s back.

Moments later, James Storm is thrown to the outside and then roughed up by the other members of LAX. As the show heads to break. When Impact returns, Storm and Santana hit a double clothesline knocking each other down. It gives Storm a chance to make the tag to Bram but LAX distracts Brian Hebner. So the ref does not see Storm tag in Bram. The beatdown on Storm continues as Bram is forced out of the ring. James Storm ends up battling back by hitting a spinebuster on Ortiz. He is finally able to make the tag to Bram. The LAX are on their heels as Bram takes the fight to them. He hits a pop up power bomb on Ortiz. When Bram heads to the top, Santana kicks him off the ropes but Storm tags himself in. He then goes after Santana and Ortiz. In a nice looking spot, Storm hits a neck breaker on Santana while he is tied up with Ortiz…. Ortiz ends up getting DDT’d during the neck breaker. This leads to a near pinfall by Storm on Santana. James Storm continues to go at it alone. He goes on another offensive flurry and connects with a lung blower on Santana. Storm sets up for The Last Call kick but Ortiz grabs his foot from the ringside floor. Eddie Kingston tries to get involved and help Storm but he ends up striking Storm by mistake. This leads to Santana and Ortiz hitting a tandem flapjack on Storm and pinning him.

LAX defeats The DCC

After the match. The DCC start arguing inside the ring. James Storm and Kingston start shoving and butting heads. Storm yells at Bram and Kingston and walks off. He yells that he started the group and that he’s The Cowboy.

After the break. McKenzie Mitchell is backstage and breaks the news that Moose will defend his Impact Grand Championship next week on Impact against Cody. She then interviews Allie and Braxton Sutter. Braxton is asked about Sienna’s threats towards him and Allie. Sutter says that he will defend and protect Allie with his life. 

Knockouts Match
ODB vs. Rebel

Usual hi-jinx here with ODB. She takes a swig from her flask before the match starts. Rebel attacks her from behind and controls the early going. ODB rallies and takes another swig from her flask. ODB revs up with some crotch grabbing, chest pounding and then does a bronco buster on Rebel. Rebel almost steals a victory from ODB with a roll up. She gets upset with Earl Hebner’s slow count. Rebel then puts on her cowboy hat and tries to slap Earl. He blocks her and takes her hat and puts it on. Earl then plants a kiss on Rebel and does a Ric Flair strut. ODB hits a fall away slam. ODB goes for her flask again. Earl takes it away from her and takes a swig for himself. The drink is a bit too strong and he spits it out. ODB then plants a kiss on Earl Hebner and he staggers and takes a bump. ODB hits a TKO on Rebel and Earl recovers to make the 3 count.

ODB defeats Rebel

 

Bobby Lashley vs. Jake Holmes

Not much to this match. Jake tries to put up a fight and fails. Lashley hits the dominator on him. He could easily have pinned him. He decides to beat up Holmes some more. Moments later, Lashley finishes him off with a spear.

Bobby Lashley defeats Jake Holmes

The “Who is She?” reveal is teased for after the break….. When the show returns. Jeremy Borash is in the ring and introduces Karen Jarrett. She makes her way to the ring and actually signs an autograph on her way down the ramp.

Karen gets a welcome back chant from the crowd before Borash interviews her. Jeremy welcomes her back and they hug. Karen gets choked up when the fans chant for her. She says that her family has had a lot to do with the success of Impact. She talks about how so much has changed since she has been away. She notes how she has also changed and is looking forward to the new changes in Impact Wrestling. The fans chant “Fire Josh”. Karen hears them and says that she is going to put it down on a list of future changes. The fans chant Thank you Karen. As Karen continues to talk about the future. EC3’s music hits and he makes his way to the ring.

Ethan Carter puts over the fans of Impact and the whole company. Carter praises The Impact locker room. Ethan says that he considers himself a leader of that locker room. He then goes on to talk about how great he is and has been for the company. He gets booed when he proclaims that he is the only true superstar that the company has ever created. AJ Styles gets a brief chant…. Carter then salutes Karen and says that he is on board with making Impact Great but not for Karen’s last name but for his own…. Josh Mathews then makes his way to the ring and confronts Karen. Mathews rips on the announcers that he has been paired with. He then rips on Bruce Prichard and Dutch Mantel. Josh says that he thought that Bruce was actually dead already and he makes fun of how old Dutch is. Mathews calls Borash a stooge. He then rips The fans in The Impact Zone. For coming to the show only because they can’t afford a ticket. Josh says that his biggest problem is with Karen. Mathews than talks about his wife Madison Rayne and how she’s been ignored. He talks about Rayne being a former 5 time Knockouts champion. Josh then insults Karen by saying that his wife has forgotten more about wrestling than Karen would ever know. Mathews then rips on the Jarrett family and says that it is only a matter of time before they are gone again but this time, it will be forever. Karen slaps Josh and he hits the deck. The show goes off the air with an angry Josh Mathews starting at Karen Jarrett.

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