Taped from Orlando, Florida let’s talk TNA Impact…
The show started out with Eric Bischoff, wearing a gi, with Ric Flair. The announcers made up some bullshit “stats” to talk up Bischoff as if anybody would believe them or care. He comes out challenging Ken Anderson to a match even though he knows he’s not at the show. I guess that’s better than challenging Vince McMahon. Remember that one? That really worked out well for you, Eric. Bischoff then badmouths a ref for “being unfair” the previous week, kicks him and then fires him for good measure. Nobody cares about the ref, so it barely gets any heat. They leave and we’re left with some sort of open contract for Jeff Hardy’s opponent at Turning Point since Anderson is unable to compete.
Fortune’s there and they tease the impasse with Doug Williams.
In the locker room, the EV 2.0 are arguing mostly because RVD can’t trust any of them. AJ Styles shows up, mentions the PPV match where a member of the losing team gets fired and said it will be Rhino. He goes to Gore AJ, but ends up hitting RVD with it instead. That’s a shame.
They showed a nice recap of Hardy vs. Anderson since Jeff turned. When Ken does get back likely next month
Then we get Anderson on the phone “from Green Bay” where he talks about the whole situation. He says he suffered the worst concussion of his career and doesn’t know what’s going to happen with his health. They asked about Matt Morgan coming to his defense last week, but he says he’s not sure if he can trust a guy like that. I thought it was a good job of making him more of a sympathetic character. And the concussion was legitimate, by the way. The good thing is Anderson claimed in an interview that TNA has banned chairshots to the head. I hope that’s legit.
Backstage, Velvet and Angelina are getting makeup done (when aren’t they?) and Velvet tells her she has something to prove against Salina. Out pops Winter (Katie Lea) to surprise Angelina again. Winter tells her that she’ll never be alone again. Slow build to this. Fine by me. No need to rush.
Sarita d. Velvet Sky (*)
It was a decent match. Velvet looked better (in the ring) than she usually does although she’s far from a good worker. She’s average at best. I don’t understand the booking decision since Sarita lost clean to Mickie two weeks ago, then she won in a tag and now she’s winning here. I’m not really complaining because she’s a better worker than most on the roster.
Backstage, Bischoff and Jarrett are talking trash backstage. I am having WCW flashbacks. Make it stop.
More backstage, Flair asked Kaz & Williams to wrestle eachother. They agreed. Williams stuck around, asking Christy to interview him and then a microphone came down from the ceiling to hint at Mr. Anderson, I guess. He has super powers now. Maybe it meant Morgan. I dunno.
Ink Inc. & Mickie James d. Gen Me & Tara (**)
The match was six minutes of solid wrestling. They kept Tara & Mickie James-Canton apart for much of the match, which was a good way of adding heat to their match at Turning Point. It will make fans anticipate seeing them have that singles match. MJ was rocking the faux hawk to fit in with Ink Inc., which was pretty cool. I called it a mullet, but she didn’t like that too much. Haha. The guys worked well together, hitting some nice big spots and the heels worked over Jesse Neal for much of it. Mickie got in there, gave a hurricanrana to one of the Bucks. Things broke down from there, but it ended with a Mick Kick followed by Ink Inc. double teaming for the win. Post match, Tara & Gen Me attacked the winners. I have to say Tara looked awesome here with a top that said “Cougar” and shorts that said “Wanna Ride,” which matches her biker gimmick. I am very much looking forward to Mickie vs. Tara. Obviously!
Dear God, this next segment was awful. Orlando Jordan & Eric Young are talking to a shrink with the point being that Orlando’s talking about being bisexual while Young’s too stupid to realize it. I’m sure Russo found it hilarious. I found it lame.
Backstage, Team 3D and Motor City Machine Guns had a mutual respect chat about Sunday’s tag title match. The deal is Team 3D is done after this match. I don’t buy it. They’ll likely win by turning heel and stick together. No point in putting them in singles.
More backstage with Jarrett talking about Angle, saying he brought him in and Kurt made his life hell.
Jarrett came out for a promo. Basically he said he didn’t sell out to The Immortals. “I bought in,” he said. That’s a good way of putting it. He went up the ramp and Samoa Joe popped out through the stage to attack him. That was so random, but so cool looking too. He beat the crap out of Jarrett to great heat. This is what you’d call a well done feud. Rare for TNA of late. Jarrett ended up being saved by his crooked security guys, Gunner & Murphy. Joe beat them up, finishing one of them off with the Muscle Buster as Jarrett bailed. This is how Joe needs to be booked all the time.
AJ Styles d. RVD & Rhino (*1/4)
This was wrestled on cruise control, it seemed. One of the worst AJ Styles matches they’ve done. He’s arguably the best worker in the company (I say Angle with AJ in second), but this match was all about RVD’s paranoia. The finish was really weak with RVD arguing with Rhino while AJ jumped on top of both of them. Then he pinned RVD on a sloppy rollup while barely grabbing the tights. Keep in mind RVD was the World Champion and he’s losing in 4 minutes on a rollup?
Post match, RVD still thinks everybody is against. EV 2.0 ends up coming out. He thinks Dreamer is working for Bischoff. Tommy denies it, but then he throws out a challenge for Turning Point where it’s RVD vs. Tommy. RVD says to tell his boy Bischoff that he accepts.
Abyss threatened to beat up Pope’s congregation (his fans) one by one. That’s classy.
Kaz d. Doug Williams (*)
In four minutes Kaz won. With what? A rollup. Just like the match before it. Real creative finish. At least in this case it was due to accidental interference by James Storm, who was standing on the apron for some unknown reason. Post match, Flair came out to make them shake hands. This is all leading to Williams turning babyface. At least that’s the obvious thing. It’s TNA, so who really knows right?
They had Pope talking about getting at Abyss. Wasn’t he “in the casket” last week while Abyss put a huge dent in it? I saw that on last week’s show. I guess Pope’s just fine now.
More Jordan and Young. Finally Jordan says he’s “bi” and Young goes “polar!” Then he asks the doc if he validates parking. We know Jordan’s bisexual. He had the gimmick where he came out with the guy & girl. This “revelation” was a waste of time. Bad comedy.
The Pope & Abyss wrestled in a WTF?
They had a “match” of sorts. It ended in like two minutes. Abyss then attacked “fans” from the crowd that were obviously plants. Security sucks, so they got beat up. Way to teach the fans what would happen if they actually attacked a wrestler. Then they announced a match for Turning Point with Pope’s congregation standing at ringside as lumberjacks in a Lumberjack match. So what exactly was the point of involving a casket in the feud last week? Just random bullshit?
Robbie E & Cookie hyped the match against Jay Lethal at Turning Point. Jersey’s in the house, bitches.
Hey there’s Bischoff walking again and somebody said “asshole” off camera to suggest that maybe Anderson’s there.
Holy shit it’s Jeff Hardy. The TNA World Champion. He’s actually on the show! Good video package with him calling himself the Anti-Christ of pro wrestling, but why the fuck isn’t he on more? Watching this show since Bound for Glory makes me think Eric Bischoff is the World Champ. At this rate I’m sure it’ll happen soon. What I’m trying to say is PUT THE FUCKING WORLD CHAMPION ON THE SHOW. Maybe he wasn’t there in the actual building because his girlfriend had a baby, but they need to feature him more than one minute per week.
Eric Bischoff came out still in his gi. He had the contract to face Jeff Hardy with him and was asking for Anderson again. He has ring announcer Jeremy Borash read a prepared statement that introduces Eric to the crowd. It was pretty funny, I’ll admit. Basically it was an over the top way of kissing his ass saying he weighed 160 (not true), was undefeated as a fighter with all knockout wins and things of that nature. Borash didn’t want to finish it. Bischoff wasn’t happy about that, so he kicked Borash (so gently that a 1 year old would hit harder) and then had the worst beatdown ever as JB coiled like a little kid. That was not a good sight. Then Ken Anderson’s music started up. Lights went out. Instead of Ken it was Matt Morgan. He booted Bischoff, then pinned him and signed the contract, telling him to get Jeff Hardy ready for Turning Point. Then Morgan left through the crowd. I thought it was okay, but I think they should have done it with Morgan signing the contract early in the show and then spending the whole show building him up more as a viable contender.
I should add that right after the pin Impact “ended” and Reaction began. So the Morgan promo and signing was on Reaction technically. Confused? So is everybody. Flair came out to make the match official – Hardy vs. Morgan for the title at Turning Point – while Bischoff sold it by having a shocked look on his face.
Turning Point PPV Preview for this Sunday
* World Title: Jeff Hardy vs. Matt Morgan – The feud has very little heat to it and they’ve had no interaction. Hardy has to have a long run with the belt. Build him up for Joe. Jeff wins.
* Tag Titles: Motor City Machine Guns vs. Team 3D – It’s TNA, so expect the swerve. Team 3D wins by heeling it up and not retiring after all. Then you’ve got a hot feud for the belts with the Guns chasing them.
* X Division: Jay Lethal vs. Robbie E – I think Robbie E wins even though Lethal’s the superior worker. They want to push The Shore going forward, so the title change is likely. It’s not like the title is as valuable as it used to be anyway.
* Fortune vs. EV 2.0 – Losing team has somebody fired. That means EV 2.0 loses with Sabu getting the axe. None of the Fortune guys are getting fired. Sabu is being released.
* Mickie James vs. Tara – It has to be my girl Mickie James-Canton here. She’ll likely win here and then move on to feud with Madison Rayne for the title next month. That makes sense to me. I hope they get 10 minutes to put on a great match.
The following matches aren’t listed on TNA’s Turning Point website as I write this late Friday night. They were all announced on Impact.
* The Pope vs. Abyss – I’d guess that Pope goes over here.
* Samoa Joe vs. Jeff Jarrett – If Joe doesn’t win they are really fucking stupid. I don’t know how much better I can put it. It needs to be clean too. No ref bumps. Clean win please.
* RVD vs. Tommy Dreamer – It should be RVD because he’s the bigger name, but he’s on that paranoid losing streak. I guess Dreamer wins.
Final Thoughts
There weren’t a lot of highlights on this show, but what I liked most was the Joe/Jarrett brawl. That really worked well. If Joe doesn’t beat Jarrett and do so convincingly then this company really has serious booking issues. Joe should be the #1 babyface in the company.
The Morgan thing was handled well, but announcing a PPV main event so late is not going to encourage PPV buys at all. They should have started the show with Morgan taking out Bischoff and then made a bigger deal out of Morgan vs. Hardy. Why not have a brawl with them or something? That match has no heat.
The biggest question I have coming out of this show is why does Eric Bischoff get so much screen time? It’s not TNA Wrestling. It’s the Bischoff show. I’m not saying he’s a bad performer, but he was on way too much. Meanwhile Jeff Hardy, the World Champion, got one pre-taped segment just like the way before. Of the two guess which one of the two is a draw? Jeff Hardy. Guess which one is defending the World Title – the biggest “prize” in TNA? Jeff Hardy. You’re having a PPV on Sunday featuring two guys that have no on screen history (at least recently). I know their hands were tied a bit because of Ken Anderson’s injury, but instead of having Bischoff on the whole show they should have made Morgan vs. Hardy the focus. Try to convince people to buy the PPV. Instead all they seemed to do was convince people that Eric Bischoff is an egomaniac that should not have booking control of a wrestling company. It’s not like Hogan or Russo are any better.
I don’t know what hurt my head more: The majority of this show or the five tequila shots I had on Thursday night. I think it was this show. Happy Birthday to me.
One other thing I want to mention. It came out this week that Dixie Carter’s mother had to step into the company to oversee the financial aspect of it. The source is the Wrestling Observer. They’re also canceling house shows, which is a good idea since they’re only averaging 450 people at house shows of late. It’s another example of how mismanaged this company is. It’s a damn shame because the talent level is there. The booking is not. And that’s the biggest issue.
Oh, and bring Kurt Angle back. The show needs him.
Rating: 4 out of 10
Last week: 4
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If you want to read a really good article about TNA’s ratings and why their creative team needs to change check out this article by Bryan Alvarez because he says it in a much better way than I ever could. He’s not a TNA hater. Neither am I. But fact are facts and he lays it out there perfectly. Read it, please.
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