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TNA Impact Wrestling Report – 4/24/2014

We look back at Eric Young’s World Title win from two weeks ago, then we go to the ring where Magnus comes out to kick off the show. He doesn’t think he lost the title, he thinks he had it stolen from him and that good help is hard to find. He’s not going to talk crap behind Abyss’ back, he wants him to come out to the ring so he can say it to his face. Abyss comes out to the ring and Magnus says that he’s starting to realize why everybody in his life has abandoned him and kicked him to the curb: because he’s a huge disappointment. He asked Abyss to do one thing: make sure he keeps the World Title. Abyss says that MVP threatened to fire anyone who came to the ring during that match, but Magnus reminds Abyss that he doesn’t work for TNA, he works for Magnus. That brings him to his next point: Abyss’ services are no longer required at Magnus Enterprises, and he wishes Abyss well in his future endeavors. Abyss says it was never about the money or financial gain, it was about him feeling like he belonged. He trusted Magnus, and Magnus said he was his friend, but now he truly realizes that all he is is a self-centered, arrogant jackass, and just like everyone remembers, he is Abyss, he hurts people, he destroys lives, he ends careers, and since he’s no longer an employee of Magnus’, he’s going to start next with him. Magnus says he won’t because he isn’t a contracted wrestler, he’s a civilian, so he’ll have Abyss arrested and press charges if he lays a finger on him.

As if you didn’t see this coming, MVP comes out to the ring and says that he wants to address this situation. Abyss isn’t his favorite person, but people deserve second chances in life, and he wouldn’t be here if someone didn’t offer him a second chance. He knows Abyss wants a place to belong, so since he was just fired by Magnus, he’ll give Abyss a second chance and offers him a full time spot on the TNA roster if he can defeat Magnus tonight. Magnus tells MVP he can’t do that, but MVP says he can and he just did. Abyss tells Magnus he never liked him, and tonight, he’s going to kick his ass.

Spud is backstage getting ready when EC3 walks in. Spud says he’s not in the mood for the usual pep talk about the eye of the tiger, but EC3 says he’s not doing that because he saw the real Kurt Angle last week. He realizes there’s only one man on this planet who can beat Kurt Angle, a man with physical prowess, athletic ability, and a last name that transcends stardom. EC3 is of course referring to himself, and he’s asked Spud for a lot: a lion, a tiger, and a hunter, but tonight, he needs Spud to be a gazelle. EC3 points to the ring, and Spud marches to his fate.

Kurt Angle vs Rockstar Spud

Spud tries unsuccessfully to go after Angle’s knee, but Angle no-sells and easily tosses Spud. Spud stops a backdrop attempt with a boot to the face, but it doesn’t faze Angle, who chases Spud out to the floor and around ringside. EC3 grabs Angle’s leg as he tries to enter the ring, allowing Spud to nail Angle and connect with a shot off the top rope. He tries another one, but Angle pops up, runs up the corner, and suplexes Spud to the mat. He quickly gets the anklelock and forces Spud to tap.

Winner: Kurt Angle

EC3 comes right in and goes after Angle’s knee and tries to put it in his heel hook, but Willow runs out and chases EC3 and Spud off with his umbrella.

The Beautiful People are backstage talking about how ugly things have gotten with Madison, but they have a bag of stuff with them and they’re going to give Madison a much needed makeover tonight.

MVP walks into his office and finds Kenny King on his couch. MVP asks if he can get him a latte and if he’s comfortable, then says that if King wants to be featured, he’ll give him a featured match.

Madison Rayne comes out to the ring and says she hears that the Beautiful People want to give her a makeover, so she tells them to come down so they can have at it. The BPs come out and Angelina says Madison is looking a little run down, and that she ought to feel forgiveness toward them since they’re offering to give her a makeover. Madison says she’s right, and she’s sorry…that she’s about to do this. She goes at both girls, but Velvet and Angelina take her down and put the boots to her. Velvet holds Madison while Angelina screams at Madison that she was nobody before they brought her into the Beautiful People. They only did it to make the two of them look better, but that’s going to change right now. Brittany runs in and tries to make the save, but Velvet and Angelina take her out and then Velvet gives Madison In Your Face. Angelina shoves a bag with her face taped to the front over Madison’s head, thus completing the makeover.

Ken Anderson is in Samuel Shaw’s hometown, and he’s got Samuel’s childhood dress and is going to check the place out.

Kenny King is backstage, and he’s…STRUTTING!

Gail Kim finds Madison Rayne backstage and says that she doesn’t want to let the Beautiful People ruin her Knockouts Division, and they’re not besties anymore, but she wants Madison to be her partner tonight. Madison says she’ll do it, and Brittany says she’ll be there too, but Madison again says she appreciates it, but doesn’t need her there.

Kenny King vs Bobby Lashley

Lashley easily manhandles King, repeatedly taking him down and then pounding on him in the corner with forearms. Lashley runs King over with a shoulderblock, but King takes him down with a nice drop toehold and gets a side headlock. Lashley easily regains his base and dumps King, then plants him with a side suplex. King rolls out to the floor to catch a break, but comes in and gets puwerslammed. King uses the referee ass a shield and tries a cheapshot, but Lashley catches his hand and prepares to knock his lights out, but the referee steps in and gives King an opening to go to the eyes and catch Lashley with a springboard dropkick. King gets Lashley ina modified crossface chickenwing, but Lashley breaks free and pops King over with an overhead release suplex. Lashley sends King to the corner and follows him in with a charging shoulderblock, then dumps King with another amateur throw. King catches Lashley with the cartwheel kick and goes to the second rope for a Blockbuster, but Lashley catches him in midair in a suplex position and drops him. THAT was insane! Lashley goes for the spear, but King bails out to the floor and gets himself counted out.

Winner: Bobby Lashley by countout

King walks off to the back while Lashley gives him a “you gotta be kidding me” look while getting his hand raised.

Back to Ken Anderson driving around Samuel Shaw’s town, and he finds his way to Shaw’s parents’ house. He rings the doorbell and is greeted by Shaw’s mother…a redhead named Christy.

James Storm comes in and asks his “partner” is ready, and Roode asks if he remembers when he came by Storm’s local watering hole and kicked his ass. Storm says he remembers that, and also remembers when Roode smashed a bottle over his head and cost him his World Title, and Roode asks why he still wants to team with him after everything that happened between them. Storm says it’s because Beer Money was the best team in the world, and they were unbeatable together. He never got that out of Gunner, so he wants to show Gunner what a real tag team looks like and make his daddy cry again. Roode laughs and says that makes him smile, and as Storm knows, he never smiles.

Austin Aries is backstage, and he’s…WALKING! He faces MVP…NEXT!

MVP vs Austin Aries

They do basic feeling out stuff until MVP gets Aries in a headscissors and Aries uses his dropkick counter. MVP quickly fires back and drops Aries, but Aries rolls out to the floor to break the momentum. MVP comes out after him with a double axhandle, but Aries nails him and then comes off the top rope with a double axhandle of his own to the floor. Aries hits a pair of high impact elbows for 2, but MVP dodges the IED and hammers Aries with a series of corner clotheslines. Aries bites MVP’s arm to stop the barrage, but that just pisses off MVP, who rips Aries’ head off with a roaring clothesline. Aries still somehow kicks out, so MVP does Ballin’ and then waits for Aries to regain his feet. Aries hits a roaring elbow, but MVP comes right back and dumps Aries on his head with a German suplex. Aries with the kneebreaker/suplex combo, hits the IED, and covers for 2. Aries goes for the 450 splash, but MVP moves out of the way, then hits his finish for the win.

Winner: MVP

Great match! Really good, hard hitting strong style match.

We see a video package looking at Sanada’s X Division Title win in Japan, Muta putting Sanada over as someone who can beat anyone, and Sanada training and talkin about how he will settle for nothing less than being a champion.

Back to Ken Anderson with Christy Shaw, who says she makes him an apple pie and delivers it to his bedroom every day…in the basement. Samuel’s not here right now, but Mrs Shaw really wants to show him his bedroom, so they head on down there and we’ll catch up with them later, I guess.

James Storm & Bobby Roode vs Gunner & Bully Ray

Storm and Bully start us off, but that quickly turns into Bubba fighting off both opponents before trapping Roode in his corner and double teaming him with Gunner. Storm grabs Bubba’s ankles and crotches him on the ringpost, and the former Beer Money is in control. They do a great spot at one point where Roode distracts the referee and Storm chokes Bubba on the bottom rope, and gnaws on his skull to add insult to injury. I love this match because these are guys who really know how to work. Bubba fights his way free and Gunner comes in and cleans house on both Roode and Storm. Bubba and Gunner give Storm the Whazzup, then Bubba tells Gunner to GET THE TABLES! Gunner sets a table up at ringside and puts Roode on it, but Roode rolls out of the way of an elbowdrop and Bubba goes through the table instead. Roode heads into the ring and gives Roode an F5, but Storm takes his head off with the Last Call and covers him for the win.

Winners: James Storm and Bobby Roode

Great match, and I’m thrilled to see Beer Money back teaming, even if it’s semi-regularly.

Magnus is backstage saying it’s time to teach a lesson to people who don’t follow orders, because it’s time for everyone here to understand whose time it really is, and there’s nothing that MVP, Dixie, or anyone else can do about it.

Back to Ken Anderson as he heads down to Samuel Shaw’s bedroom in the basement. Anderson looks inside and goes “Oh…my god.” as we go to commercial.

We come back and Samuel Shaw comes in and finds Anderson in his bedroom and asks what he’s doing there. Anderson asks him to explain something, and I guess I turned my back just long enough to miss what it was, but they start fighting and the cameraman who followed Anderson there hightails it upstairs and runs into Christy Shaw, who asks what those boys are doing down there and offers him pie. He says he doesn’t want any of her pie, and Sam Shaw comes upstairs with blood on his lip, gets down on his knees, and hugs his mom, who waves at the cameraman as he gets outta Dodge.

The Beautiful People vs Madison Rayne & Gail Kim

Madison and Velvet start us off, but it quickly turns into all four girls going at it and Gail and Madison getting the better of the exchange. They head out to the floor where Madison smashes Velvet and Angelina’s heads together, then Madison tosses Velvet back inside and does the thing where she humps Velvet’s head into the mat. Gail comes in and regulates Velvet as well, but Angelina comes in and yanks her down by the hair and tags in to make a quick cover for 2. The BPs try to run after taking some offense, but Gail and Madison brings them back to the ring and go back to working Angelina over. Angelina gets a sleeper, but Gail counters to a backbreaker for 2. Madison comes in and catches Angelina with a leaping enziguiri, then takes Velvet out as well. Velvet goes out to the floor and gets into it with Gail, smashing her face into the apron, then distracts Madison just long enough for Angelina to roll her up with a handful of tights for 3.

Winners: The Beautiful People

We check in with Knux in his hometown, as he cuaght up with his firedancing girlfriend at the bar. He says he’s proud of her for mastering the fire dance, and he asks if she’s proud of him. She says she is, and that she wasn’t as supportive of wrestling as she should have been. Knux says he can’t stay here and that he has to go back to Impact Wrestling, so Firedancing Girl says she won’t make the mistake of letting him go again, and she’s going with him this time.

Abyss is backstage saying that tonight is about redemption. All he wanted was a sense of belonging, but now he knows that Magnus is just a pompous SOB. He made the mistake of hurting those who cared about him most, they know who they are, he knows who he is, and tonight, this massacre is for him.

We see a cool video package of the Wolves talking about how they came to TNA for two reasons: to get rid of Dixie Carter, and to win the TNA World Tag Team Title. The Bromans have done everything they could think of: getting counted out, disqualified, finding reasons to have the match cancelled, but now they have to face them in a handicap match. The only thing is that nobody said who was handicapped in this one, because even though they have their annoying DJ with them, the hunt…is…ON.

Eric Young joins Mike and Taz at the broadcast booth, and then…IT’S MAIN EVENT TIME!

Abyss vs Brutus Magnus

If Abyss wins, he earns a full time spot on the TNA roster, but he’s gone if he loses. Abyss just unloads on Magnus to start, pummeling him with rights and lefts, tearing through him with a clothesline, and tossing him over the top rope and to the floor as we go to commercial.

We’re back, and Magnus has Abyss down on the mat and is working his knee over. Abyss tries for a chokeslam, but Magnus kicks the knee out and goes back to work on the knee. He tries a spinning toehold, but Abyss kicks him out to the floor. Magnus trips Abyss and drags him to the corner, but Abyss pulls him into the ringpost with his legs, slides out to the floor, and goes back to drilling Magnus with right hands. Abyss goes for another chokeslam, but Magnus blatantly kicks Abyss in the ding ding and the referee calls for the bell.

Winner: Abyss by DQ

We don’t have much time to wonder whether this means Abyss gets his job back before Magnus gets a chair, lays Abyss out with it, and then smashes his knee up with several chairshots. Eric Young finally has enough and runs into the ring to stop this, but Magnus kicks him in the ding ding as well, and now works the champ over with the chair like he did to Abyss. Magnus stands over Young and grinds the chair into the back of his neck before turning back to give Abyss another shot, then goes back to drilling Young with the chair.