We start with a recap of Hulk Hogan making the announcement that he will retire on tonight’s show, then we head to Knoxville as Hulk Hogan and Eric Bischoff arrive at Impact, then we go to the arena Beer Money comes to the ring in front of a very enthusiastic crowd. James Storm says it’s about damn time Hulk Hogan steps aside, and he knows they’re going on right before Hogan comes out, but Hogan will have a tough time following them because they’re going to tear it up tonight. Bobby Roode welcomes Storm home to Tennessee, and talks about how Kurt Angle tried to destroy Fortune by forcing them all to wrestle him. Fortune is a family, but Roode needed the matches to get himself mentally ready because he knew that if he could beat Kazarian and Styles at their best, he knew he could beat Angle. He wants James Storm to give him his best as well because he’s been his tag team partner, his best friend, and his brother (crowd chants Next World Champ at him). Storm says he knew that when he shook Roode’s hand to form Beer Money, he was shaking the hand of the future World Champion, but he knows Roode thought the same thing. Storm has something to prove to himself and he might just beat Roode tonight, and he’s going to drink his beer, look Roode right in the eye, and tell him he’s sorry about Roode’s damn luck.
Sting is backstage in a red jacket and a Hulkamania t-shirt, and he’s…WALKING LIKE HE’S GOT SOMETHING WRONG WITH HIM!
In light of Hulk Hogan’s impending fake retirement, we’re going to look back throughout the evening at some of Hogan’s top moments in Impact Wrestling. This ought to be entertaining. We go back to January 4th, 2010 when Hogan arrived in TNA for the first time.
To the ring for our first match…
Gunner vs Frankie Kazarian
This is based off of last week when Kazarian got into it with the Jarretts and Gunner came out to kick the crap out of him. They trade wristlocks until Kazarian dropkicks Gunner and clotheslines him to the floor. Kazarian goes to the apron but Gunner pulls his ankle and sends him crashing to the floor. Gunner starts working over the arm of Kazarian, slamming it into the ringpost and then yanking it like a water pump. Gunner with a hammerlock slam, but Kazarian comes out of nowhere with a springboard leg lariat and then a springboard legdrop for 2. Gunner rams Kazarian’s shoulder into the ringpost and then goes to a really nasty, high-angle armbar until Kazarian taps.
Winner: Gunner
Holy crap, a clean finish? Based on psychology? What company am I watching again? Oh wait, Gunner attacks Kazarian after the match so the referee reverses the decision.
Winner by DQ: Frankie Kazarian
Yep, this is Impact Wrestling! Gunner goes to the back and yells at fat wrestling fans on his way up the ramp.
Ken Anderson comes out to the ring, makes a lame joke about his hat, and is about to do something he’s not known for doing: he’d like to apologize to the people who matter the most to him, the people he turned his back on in a moment of weakness, his assholes. He’s not good at playing the political game in this business and he’s seen others swing from the boss’ nuts and get ahead, while he’s done things his own way and he’s had to fight for everything he’s got. He joined Immortal in a moment of weakness (crowd boos him) and he’s not sure what he was thinking, but he has no regrets and he learned a lot from the experience. For instance, Bully Ray is a giant douchebag…oh, here comes Bully Ray now. Holy crap, he looks like he’s dropped a lot of weight. Anderson says that for months now, Bubba’s attacked him from behind and hit him with his giant chain and a kendo stick. He’s always seemed to get the upper hand on Anderson, and Bubba proudly tells Anderson he’s laid him out and demoralized him in front of his jackoffs. Anderson corrects him that they’re assholes and not jackoffs, but Bubba refuses to give Anderson another match. Anderson says Bound For Glory is in Philadephia where Bubba cut his teeth doing the hardcore style, and he challenges Bubba to a Philadelphia falls count anywhere match, and dares Bubba and his ego to back down from that one. For some reason, Anderson’s music hits before Bubba can answer, so Bubba just looks angry and walks off. Boy, was that an abrupt end to the promo, or what?
Bobby Roode and James Storm are working out backstage, and then the Mystery Cameraman catches up with Eric Bischoff to get his thoughts on Hogan’s retirement. Bischoff says it’s been tough and they’ve got all their affairs in order, and tonight’s going to be the end of an era. From there, we go to Brian Kendrick as he cuts a Brian Kendrick promo and says Austin Aries is a bad person and inspires people like Kid Kash to come in and disrespect the X Division. Kash walks in and says he couldn’t help but overhear Kendrick talking and says that if he’s got something to say, to say it to his face. Kendrick starts to, but Kash lays him out and pounds the bejeezus out of him.
Mickie James & Velvet Sky vs Winter & Madison Rayne
Madison cracked me up with the over the top smile and wave while she was walking out with Winter and Angelina. Hey, remember when almost everyone in this match was in the Beautiful People? Yeah, me neither. Mickie and Winter start and Winter quickly tags out to Madison, who goes back and forth with Mickie until Velvet comes in and lays Madison out with a dropkick. Winter tags in and Velvet lays her out with a series of clotheslines before tagging in Mickie for a top rope Thesz press. Mickie with a flying headscissors and a hanging neckbreaker for 2, but Angelina Love hooks Mickie’s ankle from the outside and Winter nails her and hits an elbowdrop for 2. Winter and Madison double team Mickie for a moment or two until Mickie makes the hot tag and goes to work on Winter. Velvet hits a sitout Pedigree on Winter for 2, and Angelina tries to hook Velvet’s leg, but accidentally catches Winter. Angelina gets up on the apron and Velvet knocks her off, then Madison rolls Velvet up from behind and gets the win.
Winners: Winter & Madison Rayne
Jeff Hardy is backstage, and he’s…WALKING!
Time for another Hulk Hogan moment, as he teamed with Abyss, proud owner of Ric Flair’s Hall of Fame ring. We then go to Kurt Angle complaining to Eric Bischoff about Jeff Hardy, who he told to never come back to TNA again. Eric says not to worry about it because he’ll take care of Hardy.
We go out to the arena as Bischoff makes his way to the ring and tells the fans to sit down, shut up, and take notes. He promised Angle he would take care of a little administrative detail, so he calls Jeff Hardy out to his ring. Jeff comes out so Eric could tell him that he’s worked with great starts like Verne Gagne, Ray Stevens, Nick Bockwinkel, Hulk Hogan, and Kurt Angle who paved the way and gave them all an opportunity to feed their families and take care of friends in need so they could live an amazing lifestyle. Bischoff took advantage of his opportunities, while Hardy made dropping the ball an artform. Hardy is an amazing athlete and one of the most charismatic guys he’s ever met, but he’s also a colossal screwup. He’s spent weeks walking around asking for second chances, but Bischoff is done giving him chances because Hardy showed up all pilled up at Victory Road and let everyone down, so Hardy is officially done in TNA. Hardy says he’s glad Bischoff got all this off his chest in front of these people, and maybe some agree with him but some probably don’t, so he’s got one thing to say. Bischoff tells him to say goodbye if he wants to, so Hardy kicks him in the gut and gives him the Twist of Fate, yells “screw you” at him, then escapes through the crowd as Immortal runs out to make the save.
We go backstage to Jeff Hardy, who’s mad because he tried to apologize to everybody, but what Bischoff did was just wrong and he’s not going to take it anymore. We go to another Hulk Hogan moment, as he won the lawsuit to retain ownership of the company on March 3rd, 2011 as Dixie Carter stood there crying.
Samoa Joe vs Crimson
Crimson jumps Joe as soon as the bell rings and beats him down in the corner. Joe fires back with rapid fire right hands, but Crimson wipes him out with a short clothesline. Crimson gets a three quarter nelson and rams kneestrikes into Joe’s skull and covers for 1. Joe rams Crimson into the corner and hits a leaping enziguiri, but Crimson ducks a clothesline and hits a T-bone suplex. Joe rolls out to the floor and Crimson goes out after him, ramming Joe’s back into the ring apron. Joe catches Crimson’s foot on a kick attempt and rams it into the guardrail, then wedges Crimson’s foot in the barricade and shoves him on his back, torquing the leg in the barricade. They head back inside where Joe sweeps Crimson’s legs out from under him. Crimson tries the Sky High, but Joe slips out and clips Crimson’s legs from behind and hits a senton. Joe locks Crimson in a heel hook and Crimson tries to make the ropes, but Joe drags him back out to the middle of the ring. His shoulders are flat on the mat in this hold, but nobody notices and he rolls Joe into a small package for 3.
Winner: Crimson
Oooh, Joe does NOT look happy. So instead of staying with him, we go to the back as Bubba Ray says that Anderson’s got huge balls for challenging him to this match in Philadelphia. Anderson thinks he’s got Bubba where he wants him, but screw him and screw Philadelphia because he’s from New York City.
James Storm is backstage and again says he’s happy for Bobby Roode getting a shot at the title at Bound For Glory, but it’s also time for him to prove that he’s one of the greatest wrestlers in the world. We then go to a video package of Bobby Roode talking about how he’s been wrestling for 13 years and he’s been here since the beginning with guys like AJ Styles and Samoa Joe. We see Roode going to the building where he saw his first wrestling show, and then we get comments from Roode’s parents as they talk about his determination and work ethic. He respects Kurt Angle as a wrestler, but is going to take Angle’s vendetta against the younger wrestlers and turn it against him when he wins the title at Bound For Glory. Another great video package.
It’s main event time!
James Storm vs Bobby Roode
The bell rings, they shake hands, and we’re off. Storm goes right to work on Roode’s arm, blocks a hiptoss attempt by Roode, and then they manage to dodge the next half dozen moves each other tries because they know each other so well. Storm hits a nice duck under into a rear waistlock, Roode hits a switch and then a series of armdrags on Storm. Roode goes for the Crippler Crossface, but Storm makes it to the ropes. They start exchanging words as we head into a commercial break.
We’re back, and Storm is ramming shoulderblocks into Roode’s ribs in the corner. Roode responds with some hard chops and then hits the Mr Perfect necksnap. Storm and Roode shove each other and then trade right hands in the middle of the ring until Storm clocks Roode, who goes down like a ton of bricks. Roode responds with a boot to the face and a Blockbuster for 2, but Storm drapes Roode on the second rope and hits a DDT for 2. Roode backdrops Storm to the apron, Storm hits a leaping enziguiri from the outside, then comes back in and walks right into a spinebuster for 2. Roode goes up top, Storm shakes the rope and causes Roode to crotch himself, then hits a superplex. Storm crawls over and makes a cover, but only gets 2. He sets up for the superkick, Roode ducks and goes for the Perfectplex, Storm blocks and goes for another superkick, and Roode catches Storm in the Crippler crossface. Storm makes it to the ropes to force the break, then hits a Codebreaker followed by a lungblower, but only gets 2. Crowd chants “this is awesome” as Storm picks Roode up and they run head to head and wipe out the referee all in one motion. Storm rolls out to the floor as Kurt Angle runs down to ringside and rams Storm into the ring steps before rolling him back into the ring. Angle heads to the back and Roode starts to come to and crawls over to make a cover. The referee comes to and makes the count, but Storm gets his shoulder up at 2. Roode hauls Storm to his feet and Storm shoves Roode off and goes for the superkick, but collapses before he gets the move off and Roode hits the Perfectplex for the win.
Winner: Bobby Roode
Excellent match and I liked that Angle’s interference didn’t lead directly to the finish.
Hulk Hogan is backstage, and he’s…PREPARING TO FAKE RETIRE!
Hulk Hogan wobbles his way down to the ring for his fake retirement, pauses for a Hogan chant, and says that he realized that today was the final day he would be in the wrestling business and it was a tough thing to swallow. But he came to Knoxville where he was welcomed with open arms, and the fans showed him so much love it felt like his first night back in TNA. It was weird telling his family he was going to be home all the time after being on the road for so many years. It’s going to be tough finding something to do with all his new free time, and this is definitely the end of the line for him and he profusely thanks the fans for all their support over the years. He holds up his Hulkamania weightlifting belt and says that there have been generations and generations…(he pauses for a “thank you Hogan” chant)…and this could go on for another 30 years, but it’s time to put Hulkamania to rest. He lays the belt in the middle of the ring, and says it’s time to let the celebration begin.
Sting’s music hits, and he comes out in his bright red and yellow Hulkamania garb. Hogan tells Sting he’s not welcome here, and Sting says he’s sorry to bring a little bit of rain to this, but he wants to know if anyone buys this stuff about retirement. Hogan says that nothing lasts forever in this business and Sting needs to know when it’s time to leave him alone because he’s said his goodbyes and he’s retired. Sting says it’s possible he’s just jaded because of the business, or it could be that he knows Hogan better than anyone in the business. It’s amazing about all the cameras that are all over every building and every street, and he’s got some compelling footage of Hogan. Hogan says it’s time for Sting to leave, and Sting says he will after we watch this footage. We see a GTV recording where he and Bischoff are laughing and having a really over the top conversation about fooling the fans into believing he’s really retiring and tricking them into selling their trailers to buy Hulk Hogan merchandise.
Hogan says that Sting’s broken every rule and he’s ruined everything and he’s had enough. He still refuses to wrestle Sting, but he’ll damn sure fight Sting at Bound For Glory and if Sting wins, he’ll hand the company back to Dixie Carter. Hogan immediately claps his hand over his mouth since he apparently didn’t mean to say that, and Sting says he got what he wanted and heads to the back as this week’s show comes to a close.
Source: PWInsider
