ThunderStruck: Raw Analysis 12/26/11

We open Raw with John Laurinaitis coming to the ring to CM Punk’s entrance theme. Laurinaitis comes down and introduces himself as the executive vice president of Monday Night Raw. No word botch there to open the show or anything. Is he intentionally stupid? Laurinaitis says he is wearing Punk’s t-shirt as a way to honor him here in his hometown of Chicago. This brings out CM Punk. Punk gets a great pop from the Chicago crowd. Punk says JL is trying to get a reaction from him. Punk asks the crowd what is stopping him from kicking JL in his face. JL says he is Punk’s boss and that he may fire him. JL says he is giving CM Punk the night off, a gift he would never expect. JL then says he is kidding and calls himself unpredictable. Punk says JL can’t be unpredictable. JL says Punk is going to be in a gauntlet match tonight and that anybody who pins CM Punk will get a title shot next week on Raw. Punk asks what happens if he beats all three guys. JL says he hasn’t given it much thought. Punk suggests that once he beats all three opponents, he gets a fourth match where he will face JL himself. JL says it isn’t good business for him to beat Punk as WWE Champion. Punk polls the audience after pointing out that JL said he gives the WWE Universe what they want. JL says he’s on. Anyone seeing the obvious resemblance to McMahon/Austin here with these two? History repeating itself might not bring in the ratings like it used to, but I look forward to seeing Punk get in the ring with JL if in fact it happens. Cryptic video is then shown before the commercial break.

 


 

Booker T is taking on Cody Rhodes next. What a great match! This was ppv quality all the way and Booker T is able to pick up the clean victory with the axe kick! Booker does a spinarooni for the crowd after the match. I don’t think Cody losing clean to veteran Booker T hurts him in any way; I think this gives us the possibility for Cody to challenge Booker to a rematch to keep this rivalry alive. This match all around was solid and definitely needed for the first match to kick off a good Monday Night Raw.

We then get a backstage promo with Zack Ryder thanking John Cena and telling him that he couldn’t have done any of this without him. Cena tells Ryder he owes Cena nothing and that everything has happened because of Ryder. He says Ryder is the US Champion because he earned it. Ryder says tonight he has another chance to make a Christmas wish come true and asks Cena what the deal with Kane is. Cena says he is going to the ring and says if Kane is in the building, he will make sure 2011 goes off with a bang.

Lawler then stands up to announce the three opponents for CM Punk. He says Punk’s first opponent will be Jack Swagger. Punk will then face Ziggler if he can beat Swagger. If he defeats them both, Punk will then face Mark Henry. If Punk defeats all three of them, he will then get a match with Johnny Ace. I find it hard to believe that WWE will allow that match to happen.

Kelly Kelly and Big Show are talking backstage and a referee grabs Big Show and tells him he is needed in Laurinaitis’ office. Commercial break. JL is on the phone in his office and tells Brodus Clay he is going to debut on Raw next week. Big Show walks in and JL tells Show he punched his legal counsel in the face on Smackdown. Otunga talks smack to Show. Show tells Otunga he can beat him with one arm tied behind his back. JL makes the match. Show says just to remember that a giant with one arm is still better than a smug lawyer with no testicles.

Swagger and Ziggler are shown bickering backstage about their matches with CM Punk tonight. Vicky interrupts and says one of them will win the WWE Title next week. Mark Henry bumps into the group and says excuse me. I’m tired of all the backstage segments already.

Out comes Eve Torres for a mixed tag team match. Her partner is Zack Ryder. Now this might actually be a smart way to keep the divas involved and keep my attention during a match. Their opponents are Tyson Kidd and Natalya. This one doesn’t last long as Ryder hits the roughryder and gets the pinfall on Kidd. Ryder and Eve do the broski fist pumps after the match and Zack gives Eve the US Title to hold for a second while they celebrate. I like seeing Ryder win all these matches lately. Putting the guy over is the only way to make him look like a legitimate champion that doesn’t just get lucky.

Cena comes out and cuts his typical promo with the crowd in Chicago. He then calls out Kane. Close, but we get the Miz instead. Miz says he wants a match with Cena that isn’t tainted by The Rock. Cena says he wants Miz to shut up and wash the tan off his body. Cena says all they need is a referee. A ref comes down and this one is on. Cena and Miz are going through the motions when the crowd starts to chant back and forth for and against Cena. Miz rolls out of the ring and grabs a microphone. He says the crowd is chanting the wrong superstar’s name. Miz says to forget about the match and gets himself counted out. Miz says he is walking out of this crappy city with his head held high and he gets interrupted by the returning RTruth. Truth attacks the Miz and bounces him off the announce table multiple times. Truth looks insane. This guy knows how to rock his gimmick. Truth grabs a microphone and holds the Miz’s face with his hand and says what’s the fun in finishing this right now? Miz fights back and Truth beats him more. Truth says that’s the problem with Christmas; you open all your presents and it’s over. He says he wants every Monday Night to be like Christmas so he is going to take his time getting to the Miz. Truth says little jimmy said it’s okay. Truth says all acquaintances are going to get got this new years. Great return for the Truth character to come out and keep this rivalry alive. Truth hits Miz with a bottle of water before leaving.

David Otunga is taking on Big Show next. These guys go back and forth for a short bit and then Mark Henry’s music hits and as Henry enters the ring the ref calls for a DQ. Show is unable to get his one arm untied. Henry stands there taunting Show before charging into him and knocking him over. Daniel Bryan’s music hits and the champ comes down and distracts Henry long enough for Show to get his hand untied. As he goes to chokeslam Henry, Otunga runs up and Show lets Henry go. Otunga falls victim to a slam from Show. I know Henry is nursing a groin injury and I wish they would just take him off tv and let the guy heal up. He isn’t relevant enough to me for him to continue being in segments every week.

Del Rio comes out in a wheelchair being pushed by Ricardo Rodgriguez. Del Rio announces that he has completely torn his groin. The crowd chants you suck. The Bella twins come out and bicker over Del Rio. Del Rio yells at them and tells them to leave. Weird and annoying. Del Rio says he will be back more vicious and aggressive than ever before. He says he doesn’t care who he needs to destroy and that he will be WWE Champion again. Take the injured guys off tv please. It’s mostly boring guys anyway that are banged up. Get rid of them!

CM Punk takes on Jack Swagger next. Punk gets beat up a little bit but is able to recover and kick Swagger in the head to score the pinfall. Out comes Dolph Ziggler but before Dolph can get in the ring Punk is attacked by Swagger. Punk is holding his leg and he gets up to face Ziggler as we go to commercial. Back from commercial and Ziggler is working on Punk’s “injured” leg. The two put on a good match that features Ziggler just working on Punk’s leg repeatedly. Laurinaitis comes down while Punk has the cover and distracts the referee and sends Vicky and Swagger away from ringside. He then gets on the ring apron and distracts CM Punk so Dolph can hit the zig zag and get the pinfall. Looks like Dolph is getting his title shot next week. A GM interrupting a match by talking to someone competing in the ring? Really? This was stupid. I look forward to Ziggler and CM Punk next week for the WWE Championship, but this was a terrible finish for this match.

Kane comes out next to cut his promo. The guy looks to be in the best shape I’ve seen him in years. Kane starts talking and is interrupted by John Cena. As Cena comes out, an explosion occurs on the stage. Cena looks scared. Ha. Kane says Cena has lead the fans astray and asked them to rise above hate. He says the world is a dark place and that it’s okay to hate. He says humans are hateful by nature. Kane asks why rise above it when the natural impulse is to embrace it and let it consume you. This character for Kane is far better than I thought it would be. Kane says once you embrace the hate, you become honest with yourself. He tells Cena that he grows weaker by the moment as he continues with his denial. The fans do their let’s go Cena/Cena sucks chant. Kane says he is going to help Cena and all of these people are going to help him on his path towards enlightenment. He says the last thing he will hear this year is every fan in the arena chanting the words which tear his soul apart, Cena sucks. More back and forth chants as Cena looks around the arena. Cena drops his head down and Raw goes off the air.

Well, Truth returned and that was a plus. I don’t necessarily think Truth will be a face just because of the Miz feud. I see Miz possibly going face after Truth continues the vicious attacks on him every week. The divas were involved but only to a small extent(another plus). Mark Henry and Alberto Del Rio need to take some time off and get ready for the Rumble. I’m not sure why David Otunga continues to serve his pointless role every week, but it looks like it won’t be slowing down anytime soon. Zack Ryder continues to be put over and get the tv time he deserves, as does Dolph Ziggler. I doubt he wins the title next week but I can’t wait to watch him wrestle Punk again. Booker T made Cody Rhodes look like the star that he’s well on his way to becoming and you know you haven’t seen the last of these two. This Kane/Cena hate feud is actually much better than I thought it would be. Can’t wait to these two lock up in the near future. Overall, not a bad show but it definitely could’ve used less talking and more in ring action. I guess that’s what Smackdown is for. Until next time, you’ve been ThunderStruck!

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