WWE RAW Report – August 17th, 2009

– Tonight’s RAW kicks off with the pyro as Michael Cole and Jerry Lawler welcome us to the show. Lilian Garcia introduces tonight’s guest host – actor Freddie Prinze Jr. The former WWE creative team member comes out to the ring. He talks about growing up as a kid with WWE and says tonight he gets to be in charge. He says it’s about what the fans want tonight. Prinze Jr. talks about DX returning tonight and the crowd pops.

 


 

Some horror music plays and out comes walking the character in a raincoat from I Know What You Did Last Summer. He takes the mic and says, “I know what you did last Summer and I know what you’re doing this Summer…. PUT ME IN ONE OF YOUR MOVIES!” He takes off the hat and it’s Santino Marella. Santino says he wrote a screenplay and can play several movie roles. He shows how he can do a romantic comedy and performs a skit. Comedy stuff here. Santino talks about Freddie being in the upcoming season of 24 and asks if he needs a partner. Santino takes his shirt off and is sporting a CTU jacket. Good stuff for 24 fans here. Santino asks Lilian where she hid the bomb. More good comedy stuff here. Santino gathers his props and heads to the back.

Prinze talks about RAW tonight some more when Voices hits and WWE Champion Randy Orton makes his way to the ring. Orton talks about teaming with Cena tonight. Prinze reminds Orton that this is St. Louis, his hometown and the crowd pops. Orton doesn’t like this. Prinze asks Orton why he doesn’t want to wrestle in his hometown. Orton says he isn’t here to please these people, he has nothing in common with them. Orton says this is about him, all about him. Orton tells Freddie to take him out of the match tonight. Freddie says he respects Orton but he’s not Seth Green or Jeremy Piven and tells Orton not to try and bully him. Freddie starts walking off and Orton grabs him from behind. Orton nails his modified backbreaker move on Freddie and lays him out. The crowd starts chanting for an RKO. WWE officials rush the ring to tend to Freddie as Orton takes his belt and heads up the ramp with a smirk on his face. We go to commercial.

– Back from the break and Cole leads us into a replay of Freddie Prinze Jr. being laid out by Randy Orton moments ago. During the break, WWE officials helped a shaken up Freddie to the back. Lawler apologizes to Freddie on behalf of WWE and Cole says he has been taken to a nearby medical facility.

WWE United States Title Match: Kofi Kingston vs. Carlito

Lilian Garcia announces the next match as the WWE United States Champion Kofi Kingston makes his way to the ring. Lawler says Freddie made this match tonight. We get a replay from Superstars with Kofi, Carlito and the Divas as Carlito makes his way to the ring. He has Rosa Mendez by his side.

The match starts and we get a near fall. Back and forth action. Kofi dodges several attacks but Carlito hits him in the back and sends Kofi out to the floor. Back to commercial.

Back from the break and Carlito has a headlock on Kofi. During the break, we see Carlito was pretty much dominating the match. 2 count by Carlito. Carlito stomps away on Kofi in the corner as Rosa looks on. Another 2 count by Carlito. Kofi with a side Russian leg sweep, a big kick and some chops. Kofi hits his double leg drop for a 2 count. Kofi with a cross body off the top for another 2.

Kofi hits a big uppercut for a 2 count. Kofi catches Carlito in the corner with a kick to the head. Kofi with another cross body from the top. Carlito turns Kofi’s pin into a 2 count of his own. Carlito ducks Trouble in Paradise and hits a big neckbreaker for a 2 count. Kofi stops the Backstabber and hits Trouble in Paradise for the pinfall and the win.

Winner: Kofi Kingston

– Cole and Lawler plug the return of DX tonight. They have a camera outside in the parking area awaiting their arrival. Back to commercial.

– Back from commercial and we get more hype for DX. Cole leads us into a video of highlights from DX over the years.

The Miz vs. Evan Bourne

The Miz makes way to the ring for this next match and he’s wearing new trunks. We see a replay of last week where Miz as The Calgary Kid beat Eugene for a RAW contract. Miz takes the mic and talks about being banned from RAW two weeks ago. He says he’s now a new man with a new attitude, new look but the same mouth. He says he is starting his quest to become the new United States Champion. Miz has words for Kofi Kingston and says his belt will be his soon. We go to commercial.

Back from the break and Evan Bourne comes out to a big pop from his hometown St. Louis crowd. The match starts and Miz takes control. Bourne with a few counters and a clothesline. Bourne with a kick to the chest in the corner for a 2 count. Miz counters a move and gets a 2 count. Knees and kicks to the back by Miz. Miz with another 2 count. Miz applies a submission move and finally breaks it. Another knee to the back by Miz. Miz takes Bourne to the corner and hits him in the head with a bunch of knees. Miz with his clothesline in the corner.

Bourne comes out of nowhere with a spin kick and Miz goes to the floor. Bourne comes over the ropes and lands on Miz. Bourne kicks Miz coming in the ring and takes him down with a head scissors. Dropkick and standing moonsault by Bourne for a 2 count. Miz rolls Bourne up for a 2 count. Bourne kicks Miz back down and goes up to the top. Miz knocks him down but gets kicked in the mouth. Miz gets Bourne on his shoulders and turns it into his new move, the Skull Crushing Finale, for the pinfall and the win.

Winner: The Miz

– Back from the break and we get more DX hype. Replays from last week where Triple H found Shawn Michaels working at a cafeteria. A white limousine with DX spray painted on it pulls into the parking area. Triple H gets out but has to go back and get Shawn out of the limo. Shawn says let’s do this as DX make their way into the arena. Jillian Hall is jumping up and down, singing their theme music. Alicia Fox is right behind her. DX stop and dump a trash can over her head and keep walking. Santino jumps out of a corner with his CTU jacket still on and asks where is the bomb? Shawn knocks him down with Sweet Chin Music. The lights go out in the arena as DX’s music hits and the crowd pops.

DX come out and do their usual entrance. Triple H takes the mic and finally gets to asking everyone if they’re ready. Before they can get it out, Ted DiBiase and Cody Rhodes attack from behind. Legacy beat DX down. Triple H tries to fight back but can’t. Ted holds Triple H while Cody nails him with Shawn Michaels’ cowboy boot. Shawn is laid out while they beat on Triple H some more. Lots of heat from the fans for Legacy. Ted takes the mic, gets in Triple H’s face and says yes, they are ready. Shawn tries to get up and Ted puts a big boot to his head. Legacy leave the ring while DX are laid out. Ted yells to them that they aren’t ready. Back to commercial.

WWE Divas Title Match: Mickie James vs. Gail Kim

Back from the break and we get a replay of the attack on DX. Out first for the next match is the WWE Divas Champion Mickie James. Out next is the challenger, Gail Kim. They say this match was made by Freddie Prinze tonight. The bell rings and they go at it. Lots of back and forth action.

They both keep trying the same moves on each other and clothesline each other finally. Gail with a cross body off the ropes for a 2 count. Gail hits a missile dropkick from the top but only gets a 2 count. More back and forth until Mickie locks on a half crab. Mickie goes for her DDT but Gail blocks it. Mickie knocks Gail down with a right hand after a spin kick, stares at her and covers for the pinfall and the win.

Winner: Mickie James

– After the match, Mickie checks on Gail and helps her to her feet. We get a replay of earlier when Randy Orton attacked Freddie Prinze Jr.

– We go backstage where Josh Matthews is with John Cena. Matthews brings up SummerSlam and asks about him teaming with Orton tonight. Cena says despite Orton’s success, he has problems. Cena says Orton has a problem being a grown man when things aren’t going his way. Cena mocks Orton. Cena says he deals with problems and tonight he will fight Big Show and Chris Jericho. Cena says tonight, he and Orton can deal with this problem in the main event and then go to SummerSlam, where he will be WWE Champion. Chris Jericho walks up and says, the Champs are here. Big Show walks up on the other side and says Cena might not make it to SummerSlam. Jericho and Show walk off laughing as Cena looks on and we go back to commercial.

MVP vs. Jack Swagger

Back from the break and we get a replay of last week where MVP and Jack Swagger got into it. They start the match and go right at it. MVP takes it to the floor and slams Swagger into the announcers table. Swagger goes back in the ring and beats MVP down in the corner. Swagger unloads on MVP as the referee tries to pull him off. The referee calls for the bell and DQ’s Swagger. MVP gets up out of nowhere and attacks Swagger as he’s arguing with the referee. Swagger heads to the ramp as MVP’s music plays and they have words.

Winner by DQ: MVP

– We see Freddie Prinze Jr. backstage limping to the ring. A WWE official is trying to talk him out of it. Freddie says he doesn’t care, he’s going out there as we go back to commercial.

Falls Count Anywhere Match: Chavo Guerrero vs. Hornswoggle

Chavo Guerrero is out first for this match that’s under Falls Count Anywhere rules. Hornswoggle is weary about getting in the ring. The bell rings and Hornswoggle goes under the ring. Chavo crawls under after him and they’re gone.

They come out from under separate sides of the ring. Hornswoggle runs to the back and Chavo chases him with the referee. Chavo stops and asks Primo where Hornswoggle is. Chavo is looking around in boxes and asks some guy if he’s seen him. Chavo walks into a locker room door and gets hit in the head with a swinging paint can, like in Home Alone. Hornswoggle comes out of another door, laughs and covers Chavo for the pinfall and the win.

Winner: Hornswoggle

– After the match, Chavo gets up. Mark Henry walks out of the locker room where the paint can came from. He tells Chavo it wasn’t him. McCaully Culkin from Home Alone fame appears and it was him!

– Back from the break and we get a promo video for Floyd Mayweather. It’s announced he will be hosting RAW next week from Las Vegas, the night after SummerSlam.

Chris Jericho and Big Show vs. Randy Orton and John Cena

We go to the ring where the WWE Unified Tag Team Champions Chris Jericho and Big Show are making their way to the ring for this non-title match. Voices plays next and the WWE Champion Randy Orton makes his way out. It seems like they’re rushing as they go right to John Cena’s entrance and out he comes to a big pop.

Music hits and out comes Freddie Prinze Jr. to the stage. Prinze says this match just became a Lumberjack Match and says he hand picked the Lumberjacks and none of them like Randy Orton. Out comes Mark Henry, MVP, Jamie Noble, Primo, Kofi Kingston and others with Henry leading the pack. We go to commercial.

Back from the break and Show has Cena in a hold. During the break, Jericho threw Cena out to the floor but none of the Lumberjacks attacked him. Cena threw Jericho out and they went to work on him. Cena fights out of Show’s hold now and tries a shoulder block but Show knocks him to the mat. Cena crawls for a tag to Orton but Show is laughing. Show lets him tag in Orton but Orton turns his back. Show continues the assault on Cena and chops him in the corner.

Show charges Cena but Cena kicks his leg out. Cena slaps Orton on the back and throws him into the ring. The have words. Show knocks Orton out to the floor and MVP taunts him. Henry picks up Orton and throws him through the ropes back into the ring. Show chokes Orton in the corner and hits him with a big knee and a clothesline. Big Show hits the big leg drop for a 2 count. Jericho is tagged in. He kicks away at Orton and mounts him with right hands. Jericho slams Orton’s head into the mat and locks on a Sleeper hold off the ropes.

Orton breaks the hold with a back drop. Cena offers his hand for the tag. Jericho pulls Orton back and tags in Big Show. Show nails a huge leg drop and covers Orton for a 2 count. Show applies a nerve hold to Orton’s neck. Big Show with a suplex and a big stomp. Jericho is tagged back in but Orton catches him with a big powerslam. Jericho with a headlock on Orton. Orton fights out but Jericho knocks him back down. He misses the Lionsault. Orton tags in Cena and he takes Jericho down with shoulder blocks and a big slam. Cena goes for the Five Knuckle Shuffle but turns around to a throat hold from Big Show. He knocks Show to the floor. Cena turns around to Jericho but hits him with the Attitude Adjuster for the pinfall and the win.

Winners: Randy Orton and John Cena

– After the match, Cena’s music is playing. He turns around to a big RKO from Orton. Mark Henry comes in and chases off Orton. Jericho and Big Show start beating on Cena. The Lumberjacks come in but are cleared out. Jericho goes to the floor and Cena gets up to knock Show out of the ring. Cena stands alone in the ring and stares down Orton, who is on the ramp, as RAW off the air.

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