– Tonight’s three-hour RAW opens up with a video package hyping up the Slammy Awards. We go to the normal RAW opening video as we get ready to hit the arena.
– The pyro explodes as Michael Cole welcomes us to a “new Holiday tradition, the Slammy Awards.” Cole hypes the four-man tournament tonight to crown Superstar of the Year. It’ll be CM Punk vs. John Cena and Randy Orton vs. The Undertaker to determine the final. We go to the ring where Justin Roberts introduces tonight’s host, the infamous Dennis Miller. Miller comes out to an okay pop. The stage is setup nicely for the Slammy Awards. Miller talks about the families in the crowd and attempts some humor. He says he’s getting a feel for the wrestling crowd and going back to the script now. Miller talks about covering politics on his radio show and says the similarities between politics and WWE are striking. He compares Speaker of the House Nancy Pelosi to Vickie Guerrero. He compares DX to Bush and Cheney, in a way. Not sure if the crowd is feeling his political humor here. Miller goes on about global warming and stuff. Miller is awesome, but not sure if he’s right for the WWE crowd. Miller calls Cena and Barack Obama the golden boys. He says one just got put through a table and the other guy hasn’t brought anything to the table yet. Miller talks about the WWE Troops Tribute and plugs USACares.org which helps out the soldiers while they’re overseas fighting.
Miller brings out the first Slammy Award presenters, R-Truth and Jillian Hall. They are presenting the award for Tag Team of the Year. Jillian breaks out into her own rendition of “Whoomp There It Is” and Truth cuts her off and tells her to shut up. The nominees are DX, Legacy, The Hart Dynasty and Chris Jericho & Big Show. And the Slammy goes to… Chris Jericho and Big Show. Out come the former Unified Tag Team Champions.
Jericho looks pissed as he comes out but Show is smiling about the Slammy. The crowd boo’s the former Champions. Jericho says they must have expected someone else and a DX chant starts up. Jericho says he isn’t surprised, he knew they would win the award because they’re the best tag team ever. Jericho thanks two people… Edge, for being cowardly enough to get hurt and give up his belt and himself, Jericho, for choosing Big Show to be his partner. Jericho says he is getting their rematch for the belts tonight against DX and they will prove why they’re the best tag team.
– We go to ringside with Michael Cole, Matt Striker and Jerry Lawler. They show us stills from the WWE Title match last night where Sheamus defeated John Cena. We get ready for a commercial break.
William Regal, Vladimir Kozlov and Ezekiel Jackson vs. Christian, Kane and The Great Khali
Back from the break and the Ruthless Roundtable, William Regal, Vladimir Kozlov and Ezekiel Jackson, are in the ring. We see replays of the problems they have been having on ECW lately. Regal says they are all on the same page now and to prove that, he’s challenged Christian to bring two partners to face them tonight. Out comes the ECW Champion Christian to a nice pop. Christian says he can barely walk after last night but has found two people for tonight and out come Kane and The Great Khali.
Kozlov and Khali start the match off. Khali sends Kozlov to the mat first. Kozlov tries some strikes and a headbutt but Khali boots him to the mat. Ezekiel is tagged in by Kozlov. He rushes but Khali hits him with an elbow and tags in Christian. Christian hits a crossbody from the top for a 1 count on Zeke. Christian hits Zeke and Regal but gets hit with a backbreaker by Zeke. Zeke tags in Regal who works over Christian in the corner and hits a series of knees to the head. Regal takes Christian to the top and Christian comes off with a back elbow. Kane is tagged in. He comes in and nails a big side slam on Regal.
Kane goes for a 2 count on Regal but Zeke makes the save. Zeke is tagged in and levels Kane with a clothesline. Kozlov tags himself in but gets dropped with a big boot by Kane. Khali comes back in and hits Kozlov with the big overhand chop for the pinfall and the win.
Winners: Christian, Kane and The Great Khali
– We go back to the stage with Dennis Miller, who botches the winner’s names. He introduces Tiffany and Teddy Long to present the winner of the Breakout Star of the Year. Teddy and Tiffany dance a little. Tiffany says this is the most important award tonight. The nominees are Drew McIntyre, Sheamus, Yoshi Tatsu and Abraham Washington. And the winner is… Sheamus. The music hits and out comes the new WWE Champion.
Lots of heat here for Sheamus from the crowd. Sheamus says he supposes everyone takes him seriously now. He asks John Cena if he takes him seriously now. Sheamus taunts Cena. Sheamus names some WWE Hall of Famers who weren’t able to do what he did last night. Sheamus says he must be better than them. Sheamus says Cena is never getting the belt back. We go to commercial.
– Back from the break and we get a video package looking at the nominees for the Superstar of the Year – John Cena, CM Punk, Randy Orton and The Undertaker.
Cody Rhodes vs. Kofi Kingston
Out first for the next match is Cody Rhodes, by himself. His opponent Kofi Kingston, is out next to a nice pop from the crowd. The bell rings and Kofi’s shoulder is taped up. They lock up and go to the corner. They go to the mat and Cody misses a knee. Kofi comes back with the dropkick and Boom Boom Drop. Ted DiBiase rushes the ring and attacks Kofi. Evan Bourne runs in and helps Kofi clear the ring of Legacy.
Winner by DQ: Kofi Kingston
– Dennis Miller is at the stage and says he’s been given his own Slammy for best announcement by a guest host. He announces this match is now a tag team match. Miller tells Al Sharpton and Jeremy Piven to “suck it.”
Evan Bourne and Kofi Kingston vs. Legacy
Miller restarts the match as Legacy are on the floor. Bourne and Kofi dive through the ropes onto Ted and Cody as we go back to commercial break.
Back from the break and Ted has Kofi in a submission in the ring. During the break, they rammed Kofi’s hurt shoulder into the ringpost. Ted hits Kofi with knees to the gut now and tags in Cody. Cody comes off the top and keeps working on Kofi’s injured arm. Ted is tagged in and does the same thing Cody just did. Ted drops Kofi for a 2 count.
Cody comes back in and stomps away on Kofi. Cody with knees to the injured shoulder. Another tag to Ted as they continue working on the injured arm. Kofi manages to backdrop Ted and in comes Bourne and Cody at the same time. Bourne with a head scissors and a spin kick. Bourne knocks Ted off the apron and hits the double knees to the face on Cody for a close 2 count as Ted makes the save.
Ted knocks Kofi to the floor but Bourne knocks Ted to the floor right behind him. Cody and Bourne go at it until Cody hits the Cross Rhodes for the pinfall and the win.
– Striker hypes the Unified Tag Team Title rematch tonight as we go back to commercial break.
– We come back to the stage where Dennis Miller is. He apologizes for his lame opening and says he didn’t realize if you just yell “suck it” that you’re a genius. He introduces Santino Marella and Vickie Guerrero to present the Slammy for Shocker of the Year. Vickie gets lots of heat from the crowd here. Santino rips on Vickie eating deep fried quesadillas and rips on her being overweight. And the nominees are… Randy Orton DDT & kissing Stephanie McMahon, Batista turning on Rey Mysterio, CM Punk forcing Jeff Hardy to leave WWE and Sheamus putting Mark Cuban through a table. And the winner is… CM Punk defeating Jeff Hardy. Out comes CM Punk, without Luke Gallows. Punk takes his Slammy as we go to commercial break without a speech.
Back from the break and CM Punk is in the ring. He had a list of people he wanted to thank but the people in Texas wouldn’t have enough respect to listen. He thanks himself first and talks about what he’s done in 2009. Punk cuts a promo on the fans throwing their lives away. He talks about making Jeff Hardy leave. Punk says he is now the first-ever straight edge Slammy winner. Punk’s music plays as we go to stills from the Tables Match at TLC.
Superstar of the Year Tournament Match: John Cena vs. CM Punk
The music hits and out comes John Cena to a monster pop from the crowd. Cena is pumped and ready to go. The bell rings and Cena applies a headlock. Cena with a shoulder block off the ropes. Punk knocks Cena down and mocks him. 2 count by Punk. Punk hits the high knee to the face in the corner and the bulldog on Cena for 2.
Cena fights back but Punk picks him up for the GTS. Cena slides out of the GTS in mid-air and locks on the STF, trying to make Punk tap. Punk goes for the ropes but Cena re-adjusts the hold and makes Punk submit for the win in a pretty quick match.
Winner: John Cena
– The crowd is full of Cena fans tonight. After the match, he takes the mic and congratulates Sheamus on becoming the new WWE Champion. Cena apologizes to anyone he let down last night. Cena looks like he’s about to cry before he goes into this whole thing about picking yourself up and moving on after failure and being sorry for disappointing people. Cena says he understands if some people lost faith in him. But to those who haven’t, he says he hasn’t given up on them and won’t. The crowd is eating it up. Cena says the WWE Universe is all he’s got. Cena says he is beginning his Road to WrestleMania tonight. Cena declares he will not lose another match until he becomes WWE Champion again. We go to commercial.
– Back from the break and Dennis Miller is on the Slammy stage. Miller puts over WWE again for working with our soldiers overseas. Miller introduces Triple H to present the Match of the Year Award. Miller calls him “The Show” Triple H. HHH comes out and thanks “Dennis Millborn” for the great introduction. Triple H does the usual “are you ready…” promo for the crowd to hype the award. The nominees are… Cena vs. Orton I Quit Match at Breaking Point, HBK vs. Undertaker at WrestleMania, Edge vs. Jeff Hardy Ladder Match at Extreme Rules with CM Punk cashing in and Team RAW vs. Team SmackDown at Bragging Rights. And the obvious winner is… Shawn Michaels vs. The Undertaker from WrestleMania 25. The music hits and out comes Shawn.
Shawn comes out and Triple H shills the WrestleMania DVD. Triple H calls the match a classic and says he had to go on right after it and his match didn’t have a chance. HBK says he’s won this award two years in a row and talks about beating Ric Flair at WrestleMania the year before. HBK says he wasn’t able to break Undertaker’s streak but he’s still proud of what they accomplished that night. The crowd breaks out in a HBK chant. Shawn thinks a second before telling The Undertaker that he can beat him. Shawn says they both know it. Shawn throws out the challenge. Shawn challenges The Undertaker to a match at WrestleMania 26 out of nowhere. We go to commercial.
Superstar of the Year Tournament Match: The Undertaker vs. Randy Orton
Back from the break and the bells toll to begin The Undertaker’s entrance. Out comes the World Heavyweight Champion to a nice pop from the crowd. Taker enters the ring before Voices starts playing to bring out Randy Orton.
The bell rings and they lock up. Headlock by Orton. Taker knocks him down with a big shoulder and goes to work on the arm. Taker climbs the ropes but Orton throws him off the ropes and to the mat. Orton mounts Taker with rights. Orton takes it to the corner with more rights. Taker fights out of the corner and knocks Orton back into the opposite corner. Taker with a big splash in the corner. Taker hits Snake Eyes and a big boot off the ropes. Leg drop by Taker for a 2 count.
Taker goes for a chokeslam but Orton fights out. Orton clotheslines Taker to the floor but Taker lands on his feet. Taker pulls Orton down and leg drops him across the apron. Legacy come down the ramp and distracts Taker. He stares at them and they back up the ramp but tease him. Taker turns around to Orton and Orton nails the RKO on the floor. The referee begins the 10 count.
Orton makes it back into the ring but The Undertaker is counted out.
Winner by Count Out: Randy Orton
– After the match, Legacy hit the ring and they all attack Undertaker. He fights them off and clotheslines Legacy out to the floor. Taker chokeslams Orton. His music plays and he heads back up the ramp before posing on the stage to make the crowd pop. It will be Randy Orton vs. John Cena to determine Superstar of the Year tonight.
– Back from the break and Dennis Miller is trying to introduce Vince McMahon for the next award. Vince’s music seems to play early and cut Miller off. Vince is trying to hide being pissed here I think. He makes a joke about Miller being a bad host and says the crowd tonight is lousy. This is for the Guest Host of the Year. And the nominees are… Bob Barker, Seth Green, Shaquille O’Neal and The Osbournes. Back to Vince, who doesn’t look too happy. Your winner is… Bob Barker. We go to a pre-taped video of Bob thanking WWE for the Slammy and thanking them for selling lots of copies of his book. Barker thanks WWE for everything and wishes everyone a Merry Christmas and Happy New Year. Vince asks Miller if he were to name a guest host who would it be and drops a few politicians and Howard Finkel. Miller says he would pick Bret “The Hitman” Hart. Vince says the last time Hart was here in WWE…. Miller cuts him off and gets the crowd hype, asking them if they would be interested in Hart hosting RAW and they are. Vince walks off and Miller leads us back to commercial.
– Back from the break and Dennis Miller is backstage on the phone with someone talking about the Slammy. Chris Jericho walks in. Jericho starts to talk about Miller realizing how valuable Jericho is to RAW. Miller says Jericho thinks the world revolves around him and says when he’s sitting at home watching RAW on Mondays, he thinks Jericho is an energy blackhole. Miller keeps the tag title rematch on for tonight so Jericho can go somewhere other than RAW. They have more words before Miller gets back on the phone and we go to the ring.
WWE Unified Tag Team Title Match: DX vs. Chris Jericho and Big Show
We go to the ring where the new WWE Unified Tag Team Champions DX make their way to the ring with a nice pop from the crowd. Out next are the former Champions, Chris Jericho and Big Show. Jericho has an arm and a leg taped up. Jericho and HHH start the match off. Triple H calls the referee over to talk. Shawn comes in the ring and kneels down behind the ref. Triple H makes the referee fall back over Shawn. The referee calls for the bell, it’s a DQ. DX retain the belts.
Winners by DQ: Chris Jericho and Big Show
– After the match, Shawn takes a mic and plays dumb. He says Triple H cost them the match but fortunately, the belts can’t change hands on a DQ. Triple H also plays dumb on the mic and says unfortunately, Jericho doesn’t get another rematch after this one. Shawn rubs it in and mocks Jericho. Shawn says Jericho technically shouldn’t even be in a RAW ring right now. Shawn says Jericho is trespassing. Triple H brings out some help to assist with Jericho. R-Truth, Cryme Tyme, Finlay, Shelton Benjamin, Hurricane, Christian and others come out dressed in DX gear. They distract Jericho. He turns around to Sweet Chin Music from HBK. The DX Army escort Jericho up the ramp as he whines. Shawn takes the mic again and declares Jericho gone from RAW. We go backstage where the Superstars in DX gear are kicking Jericho out of the building. Back to commercial.
– Back from commercial and Carlito, Eve Torres and Chris Masters come out to present the next Slammy for the Extreme Moment of the Year. Masters is making his pecs jump while Carlito is talking and it’s distracting Eve. Carlito asks him to stop it. Carlito asks Eve if she can do that too. Eve says he will never find out and announces the nominees… Kofi’s Boom Drop on Orton at MSG, Big Show throwing Cena through a search light, Jeff Hardy’s ladder dive and Triple H attacking Orton at home. The winner is… Jeff Hardy’s dive at SummerSlam. And accepting the Slammy is Matt Hardy. Matt comes out and says Jeff is very honored to win and thanks everyone. Carlito interrupts and said Matt didn’t win so why is he accepting. Matt says Jeff is probably at home watching on TV… and Carlito attacks him. Carlito accepts the Slammy for himself and thanks Jesus, Puerto Rico, Team Jacob, the Academy and himself… Carlito. Masters attacks Carlito from behind with the Masterlock and lays him out. Matt gets up and celebrates with the Slammy as we go to commercial. Wow.
– Back from commercial and we go to the trailer for WWE’s The Marine 2 starring Ted DiBiase.
The Miz, Zack Ryder and Drew McIntyre vs. John Morrison, Yoshi Tatsu and Mark Henry
We go to the ring where WWE’s United States Champion The Miz is coming out for six-man tag action. Out next is his partner Zack Ryder followed by the new WWE Intercontinental Champion Drew McIntyre. Out first for the second team is John Morrison followed by his partners Yoshi Tatsu and Mark Henry.
Miz and Henry star the match off. Henry is distracted by McIntyre but still fights Miz off. Henry lifts Miz high with a big press slam and drops him on the mat. Henry tags in Morrison. Morrison comes off the top and gets a 2 count on Miz. Miz tags in McIntyre but he gets speared by Morrison. Morrison with rights. Morrison stomps on Drew but misses a running knee. Ryder is tagged in. He wants Yoshi and says to tag Tatsu in. Yoshi comes in with a side headlock and a shoulder off the ropes. Ryder taunts Yoshi but gets kicked in the head. Yoshi lays out Ryder with the kick for the pinfall and the win.
Winners: Yoshi Tatsu, John Morrison and Mark Henry
– Yoshi, Morrison and Henry dance in the ring as we see the Divas heading to the ring all dressed up. Back to commercial.
Mickie James, Melina, Kelly Kelly, Maria, Gail Kim and The Bella Twins vs. Michelle McCool, Natalya, Beth Phoenix, Layla, Rosa Mendes, Maryse and Alicia Fox
All the Divas come to the ring in evening gowns. Out first is Mickie’s team followed by McCool’s team. The referee tries to get everyone separated when the bell rings but it don’t look like it’s happening. Finally they get on the aprons. Rosa kicks Mickie to start the match and they go at it. Rosa slams Mickie to the mat and pulls her by the hair. Rosa slaps Mickie. Mickie hits the head scissors out of the corner and the big DDT for the pinfall and the win.
Winners: Mickie James, Melina, Kelly Kelly, Maria, Gail Kim and The Bella Twins
– After the match, the winning Divas celebrate in the ring. Goldust and MVP come to the stage for the Slammy Award for Diva of the Year. The Divas patiently await the announcement. Goldust says maybe he will just take the award… just kidding, he says. Goldust cracks a bad PMS joke and excuses himself from the stage. And the winner is… Maria, as voted on WWE’s website by the fans they say. Maria comes up and thanks the fans for the win. Batista comes out, in Kanye West fashion, interrupting her speech. He’s wearing a pink polo with the collar up. Some of the fans don’t seem to realize they’re playing off the Kanye/Taylor Swift incident. It’s Batista West! He’s talking tough about himself. Security comes up and escorts him off the stage as we go to commercial.
– Back from the break and Dennis Miller brings out Tony Atlas, Abraham Washington and Big Dick Johnson to present the next Slammy. Abraham is trying to talk but Atlas keeps interrupting with his horrid laugh. Johnson steps up to the mic and speaks. He cuts a promo with an accent and announces the nominees for the Oh My Moment of the Year. They are Chris Masters making his pecs jump at the Osbournes, Michael Cole throwing up on Chris Jericho, HBK superkicking the little girl and Santino Marella’s Thanksgiving pie segment. And the winner is… Michael Cole puking on Chris Jericho. The camera cuts to the announce table where Cole is flipping out, hugging Striker and Lawler. He jumps around up to the stage for his acceptance speech. Cole says he trained for years for that scene. Cole declares this a new era, the era of Vintage and makes a diss towards Jim Ross. Striker says that’s going to be blogged about.
– Miller comes back out and says he has to take his eyes out with a power drill after seeing Big Dick Johnson. Miller runs down and hands something to a kid in the crowd. He thanks WWE and everyone for having him tonight before leaving. We go to commercial.
– Back from the break and we’re backstage with DX. Lots of shilling here for merchandise for Christmas. All comedy here with Hornswoggle getting involved.
Superstar of the Year Match: John Cena vs. Randy Orton
We go to the ring where Randy Orton is making his way out to determine the winner of the Slammy for Superstar of the Year. Orton enters the ring as we go to commercial.
Back from the break and Cena comes out to a big pop. The match starts and cena gets an early 2 count. Cena with a body slam and elbow drop for another 2 count. Cena goes for the running bulldog off the ropes but Orton pushes him off and to the floor. Orton works over Cena on the floor. They go back in the ring for a 2 count. Orton stomps away on Cena. Orton with more stomps and right hands.
Cena counters a move and hits the blockbuster. Cena with the leg drop from the top and a close 2 count. Orton catches Cena in the backbreaker for a 2 count. Orton with more right hands on Cena. Cena rolls Orton out of nowhere for a 2 count. Orton with a clothesline and another 2 count. Orton stomps some more on Cena.
Orton misses a knee drop and Cena fights back with a shoulder off the ropes and the big back drop. Cena hits the Five Knuckle Shuffle. Cena goes for the Attitude Adjustment but Orton tries an RKO. They go back and forth on counters until Cena hits the AA for a close 2 count as Orton’s hand made it to the ropes to break the pin. Orton rolls to the floor. He jumps up and catches Cena’s neck on the apron and hits the Orton DDT on the concrete. Both Orton and Cena’s heads hit the floor.
Orton brings it back in the ring and gets a 2 count only on Cena. Orton goes for the punt kick but Cena moves out of the way. Cena hits the Attitude Adjustment for the pinfall, the win and Slammy for Superstar of the Year.
Winner: John Cena
– After the match, Cena celebrates in the ring. The WWE Champion Sheamus appears at the ramp. He holds the belt up high and taunts Cena with it. Cena gets hype in the ring, wanting Sheamus to come on down. Sheamus taunts Cena with the WWE Title as RAW goes off the air.