Greetings Jabronis,
So following a spate of gimmick events (and Wrestlemania), this month we find ourselves lumbered with the rather ordinary looking Over The Limit PPV, with no theme or gimmick to sell it.
Personally, I would like to see all the wrestlers having to perform under the influence of alcohol or, better yet, have them get drunk at a venue a few miles away from the location of the event and then have them drive there – thus authenticating the “Over The Limit” title. Whatever state they arrive in, that’s how they have to perform. They could have gone through a windshield, lost a limb or two, smashed in their knees, who knows?! I guarantee this would massively up the buyrates of what looks to be a fairly routine PPV.
As ever, I’m gutted not to see Christian on the card (he seriously must be regretting the day he agreed to return to WWE). It’s also rather odd that Sheamus doesn’t feature due to him being a regular fix on the top hour of RAW in recent weeks, so I fully expect him to come out and bore the crowd with a whiny promo at some point – or interfere in the WWE title match We shall see.
The card is pretty packed – 8 matches in total – so I shall declare this enough of my whimsies, and present my predictions henceforth…
The Miz and Chis Jericho v The Hart Dynasty
Not only are The Miz and Jericho the best heels in the WWE right now (along with Punk), they’re also two of the greatest heels the industry has ever seen (If you disagree with me, I’ll throw rocks at your gran. I promise). And if someone had told me I’d be writing that about The Miz a couple of years ago, I would have laughed until I coughed my lungs up.
It made sense to take the US Title off The Miz as he hasn’t done anything with it in months, and it should be held by the next rising star in the company (DiBiase or Morrison perhaps?) But with gold back around his waist in the form of the tag titles, The Miz can continue being a braggart heel and, along with Jericho, further the “revenge” storyline with The Big Show over on Smackdown.
I’ve nothing against The Hart Dynasty – they’re a talented tag team with a decent, old-school dynamic and long careers ahead of them – but putting the belts on The Miz and Jericho and thus enabling them to appear on both brands is a no-brainer. They’re that damn entertaining.
If The Hart Dynasty do pick up the upset victory, they’ll just be prolonging the inevitable, and The Miz and Jericho will get their hands on the belts eventually – perhaps even on the next night’s RAW.
Pick: The Miz and Chris Jericho
Ted DiBiase v R-Truth
DiBiase is the rising star, R-Truth is the eternal mid-card act, so logic should dictate that young Teddy picks up the win here. But, as we all know, logic isn’t a term that sits atop the WWE booking committee’s agenda, so it won’t necessarily be as clear-cut as that.
Would Virgil turn on his employer in the same way he did to Ted DiBiase Senior many years ago? The original storyline brewed for months… the WWE may well recycle the whole thing in the space of just 6 days here. But hey, that’s the age of instant gratification we live in.
Being an old school fan, incidentally, it’s a hugely enjoyable nostalgic trip seeing Virgil accompany DiBiase to the ring and I hope he sticks around for a few more appearances beyond the PPV. I hear that Vince is looking to win back some of the older demographic that he’s lost through the execution of the PG-era, and if this means more sentiments such as this then I’m all for it… to an extent.
Pick: Ted DiBiase
Randy Orton v Edge
My pick for match of the night – Edge and Orton should produce a vicious brawl here and it could go either way. Both men have strong momentum going into the bout, so it’s a tough task to correctly predict who will be staring at the lights.
I hope the WWE doesn’t book the match to end in a draw (fans should NOT see draws on PPV matches) but this feud has plenty of life left in it beyond this bout, so I wouldn’t be surprised if that’s the way things go.
For now though, I’m gonna opt for Edge to score the victory. A cheap, heelish victory will help the new face-turned Orton to score sympathy with the masses and justify the appearance of Edge’s new bushy beard… or something.
Pick: Edge
Drew McIntyre v Kofi Kingston
It’ll be interested to see who carries this match, as neither are ring generals and thus this one could seriously end up being a little rough around the edges.
Drew McIntyre has known nothing to demonstrate why he legitimately received the endorsements of HHH, HBK and Vince McMahon. His wrestling prowess is mediocre at best, he has no unique offence in his arsenal and his promos are monotone and one-dimensional. He really needs to step his game, and fast, in order to earn the respect of the “WWE Universe” (Bleh… I feel dirty even typing that phrase.)
Vince is never one to admit he was wrong though, so I see McIntyre on the receiving end of a strong push for a long while yet – includng here. Matt Hardy will likely make an appearance and perhaps cost Kofi the victory. Oh, silly Matthew.
Pick: Drew McIntyre via DQ
CM Punk v Rey Mysterio
Mr Punk can’t keep putting his hair on the line without losing… the pay-off has to come sooner or later, and I’m predicting sooner. As in right here.
On the subject of Punk, I didn’t think WWE would drag out the “masked man” storyline as long as they have. If it does indeed turn out to be the returning Joey Mercury, then those not privvy to Internet wrestling sites such as these (and it’s easy to forget that they are the masses – not us) are gonna be incredibly underwhelmed. Mercury is a decent performer and everything, but does his return really warrant a build-up of a few weeks? No it doesn’t. It’ll be akin to when Paul Roma joined the Four Horsemen.
This feud has been mighty entertaining but I, for one, hope it draws to a close here. It’s already beginning to slightly outstay its welcome. Move Rey on to a feud with Swagger, says I.
Pick: Rey Mysterio
Eve v Maryse
I expect this match to go about 30-35 minutes. It’ll almost certainly redefine what we understand by the term “modern classic” in today’s wrestling era and will feature an abundance of clinical mat-based wrestling and counters, and countless dramatic near-falls as the two wrestling legends trade power moves and their devastating finishers. I’m anticipating run-ins from both The Undertaker and HHH at some point, but I seriously hope not, as that would just cheapen the action within the epic grappling classic that’s certain to unfold here.
Pick: Everyone wins
Jack Swagger v The Big Show
I thought (and hoped) that the days were long gone when The Big Show stinks up WWE main events… But lo and behold, here we are.
There’s absolutely no point in putting the strap on Show, and if the WWE intends to build Swagger as a serious player, there’s absolutely no point in taking the strap from him – and they could further aid the laying of that foundation by not booking him to lose on TV every week. That’s wrestling booking basics, kids.
Hopefully this will be the briefest of returns to the main event for “the world’s largest athlete” (apart from The Great Khali – they always forget to mention that) and he’ll return to the tag division where he belongs once Swagger scores the pin. A feud with Jericho and The Miz with a new tag partner seems the most likely scenario.
Pick: Jack Swagger
John Cena v Batista
Batista’s imminent departure from the WWE is well documented all across the world wide web at the mo… but will WWE do a complete 180 here and put the title back on Batista, fooling us all (apart from me)…? I think so.
Of course, the invincible John Cena will never “quit” through submission, but Batista will find some ingenious way to make him utter the words, maybe through attacking a family member who happens to be in the crowd, or by threatening to start a group on Facebook entitled “Orange John Cena T-shirts are Homoerotic” (which is true by the way) or something else entirely.
I wrongly picked Batista to win at Wrestlemania, and although I went with Cena to win at Extreme Rules, I’m going with Batista again here. Fool me once shame on you. Fool me twice…
Pick: Batista (Nope, that’s not a typo)
